Saturday, June 18, 2011

Hangover 3


Well... Hangover 2 was good (I thought it was jpt but I am tired of being a non-conformist kya!) but not as good as the first one.. hoinuh ruh? And thank God they didn't show Alan crashing the Thai Crown Prince ko party.. haha! The next King of Thailand is a jackass ... and now will this blog post be banned in Thailand because I said the Crown Prince is a jackass?

Yes, them Thais have very strict laws saws.... you can party all night, plan them coup soup but don't mention the 'B' word kya.... no it's nothing to do with itching sitching ni feri... just don't mention the King's name in vain rey! Or else you will end up in them Thai jails.. and it's not like our prisons here where you can bribe them jailers and hang around Sherpa Mall all day or get shot at by some Indian hit-man .. hehe!

Anyways, let us forget Vegas, Bangkok ... the third part chahi Nepal ma nai shooting garnoo parcha because they can't go to Afghanistan .. Bin Laden is dead and he wasn't even there kya!

They can't go to Iraq (unless they want to find them missing WMDs), Cuba (unless they want to smoke a Cuban with Castro), Iran (unless Alan wants to get stoned to death!) or North Korea (and be a personal ESL teacher for Kimmy Dai's Chinese mistresses!) but Venezuela is okay..... maybe they can party with Chavez and Alan accidentally becomes the Emperor of Venezuela or something!

I hear they are headed to Amsterdam rey.. but even the flying Dutchmen are getting strict with them 'smoke all you want' buffet platter kya! So not many scences you can come up with when you are stoned out of your mind hola... baroo Mexico kaso hola.... they end up in a middle of a big drug war and Alan ends up as the most feared assassin in Mexican history or something!

Anyways... if Hangover 3 is set in Nepal then what would be the story kya? Here is my own Guffadi version if that happened.. hehe!

They show up in Kathmandu looking for Alan... who is now living in Pashupati as them 'Kuirey' Sadhu and he's been trying to get inside Pashupatinath Temple but every tyam he wants to crash in.. he gets beaten by them Desi Jogis cum arms dealers kya! Why? Because he's a foreigner.... a Mexican Catholic (talking about brownies not the 'gringo' types ni feri) will probably get an entry to our Holy Hindu temple but a white 'Hare Ram Hare Krishna' can't... kay taal ko natak ho yo?

And Alan is pissed... he smokes some and flashes his 'fake Nepali Citizenship Card' and runs around naked.... tyo cremation bhayee-raako thau ma and grabs a skull and hurls it towards the temple and you know who gets hit? Ramdev Baba.... haha!

Why are they in Kathmandu? Well, all them guys want to climb Everest..... yes, Kuirey haroo ko mid-life crisis ma yestai naya natak hooncha ... hehe! When, we Nepali men, have them mid-life crisis... we either drink to death or go crazy and join politics and try to do some bandh here and there kya!

Alan also decides to join the expedition... since he is a Nepali , he joins the expedition as a guide.... spiritual guide...hehe (hey, if a million Indians can get them Nepali Nagarikta then why can't a Kuirey have one ... kya! we have crazy laws don't we?) ... but there he is @ Everest Base Camp... just wearing a thong ... smoking some Shivaji's booti (meant prasad aka grass, weed ... all them veggie stuff kya .. not them hip-hop lingo ni feri....haha!)

Well.. everyone can climb Everest these days... not because they have the skills but because our Sherpa brothers do it all .... Apa Sherpa should be our Tourism Minister baroo! Anyways, all them Hangover guys climb Everest... so does Alan ... but who do they meet on top of the world?

Yes, you are right. Mike Tyson.. wearing only them boxer soxer and drinking some Cristal with Sarah Palin (she is dressed as Xena) .. lau jaa! It is exactly 11:55 pm, Saturday evening..... I still have to finish this Hakucha Mukarni... sorry... Haruki Murakami book .... need to make a jerkin of 'coffee' ... got my shortbread stuff ready... maybe I will boil two eggs (only egg whites, no yolks solks ... says the dakatar-ni!)

While the rest of the world is trying to figure out why they are here.. I am still confused with 'To Yolk or Not To Yolk?'... now that is the question... my friend!

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