Let us all thank our man Oli and his courtiers for letting us know about how much gold, land and other stuff they own as if it will make us feel better to know that most of our mantris are rich folks and will not engage in corruption to enrich themselves further. Our government tells us that they have a zero tolerance policy against corruption. We must remind them that they can tell us funny stories when Gai Jatra is around the corner.
If we were to believe that our civil servants and netas have stopped taking commissions from our byaparis and boras of cash from our sarkari folks for promotions and lucrative postings then we should also believe our PM's dream of making our country a heaven in a decade.
No one who has been to heaven has come back to tell us what it's like but it must be a place where no bribes are needed, no syndicate nataks in all businesses and where the common hardworking law-abiding folks are respected and live better lives than the corrupt evil doers. Yes, we are all allowed to dream and hope that our dreams will come true some day but as a Prime Minister, we want a doer not only a dreamer.
Our Transport Minister Raghubir Mahaseth is the richest mantri in Oli's cabinet. And we should not be jealous of this man. After all, his last name already tells us the whole story. As usual, most of our mantris like most of our netas and civil servants, have their land and gold in the name of their wives.
Mahaseth also has more than 40 Karods invested in stocks in the country. I think Nepal Stock Exchange should make him their brand ambassador as well. If a mantri has so much faith in our stock market then we should also join in and invest our hard-earned money in stocks and let the big players manipulate the market and make a killing while we lose our life savings.
We must thank all those rich father-in-laws who supported their daughters' marriage to poor, starving then political activists or sarkari folks. Or maybe they knew that someday, these poor young men would become mantris and hakim sahebs and make Karods of cash. Karods is nothing in this land. We see mundrey dons driving around in luxury vehicles. It seems that our politicians are the godfathers and they can get away with everything.
No wonder, our Emperor is known to have invested in hundreds of businesses and real estate in this land. Yes, after all, those who wanted to change the system are now part of the corrupt system. This country will continue to witness intense looting of state coffer and resources by the thulo mancheys till we go broke and have nothing left. Maybe then, we will rise up and finally get rid of our blood sucking parasites.
It seems that our politicians do love gold as much as the common folks. The only difference is that they can buy kilos of gold with their illegal money while common folks have to work hard for years to buy a tola of gold. And talking about gold, our smugglers have made a fortune and so have our police wallahs, civil servants and our netas.
Gorey is not the kingpin. If our government is really serious to take action against those leading the gold smuggling racket then many of our politicians, hakim sahebs and police wallahs will be in jail instead of only the small fishes.
Anything illegal in such massive scale can be done only with the blessings of our politicians. We all know that except our courts and our police. It's about time, somebody was brave enough to expose our chors instead of just keeping quiet and spending their time in jail to protect the big sharks.
Our PM also has 18 tolas of gold and nearly half a Karod cash in the bank. In three years since his last submission of property details, Oli has managed to buy three tolas of gold and has parked more than forty five lakhs in the bank. If you want to know how to save money then you can learn a thing or two from Oli.
After all, the man doesn’t have to pay for his medical expenses, vehicle and security and other nataks as well. It's good to be a thulo manchey in this land.
Our man Lal Babu Pandit has an old rusty cycle but also has lots of cash and land as well. Our Home Minister has even listed two dogs in his asset list. And our Energy Minister doesn’t have any land or house in the valley. And the man was our Finance Minister once. And our two women ministers seem to have a lot less than our other mantris.
Yes, not all of our politicians are rich people but it is very hard for us to believe that most of them will not take kickbacks from our con artists. How the sytem works in this land is that thulo mancheys do not need to go out and beg for cash.
Their personal aides (PAs) or staff below them will collect the cash and distribute it to all those concerned. So if Oli really wants to end corruption in this land then all personal aides of our politicians should be asked to come to Singha Durbar and hand in their black books.
Our political parties only want to make hard cold cash. They do not care about the people. Our mantris have to make cash from their ministries through promotions, commissions from contractors and inflated bills so that they can at least give half of their illegal money to their parties and then keep half for themselves.
That's how our system works and no politicians or political parties dare try to reform the system because if they did then they would be broke and then you can't win elections and become mantris to make tons of moolah from other chors.
Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at guffadi.blogspot.com. You may contact him at email@example.com