Saturday, April 11, 2015

Happy New Year!




Let us all thank our Emperor and his friends for only shutting down the country for a day instead of going for a three-day banda. Some of our Madhesi and Janjati parties were not too happy with the decision to call off the strike. 

I guess some of our political parties still don't get it. We, the common citizens are really tired of our political pirates shutting down the country.  We might not have enough courage to stand up against the bandas yet but the day will come when we can't take it anymore. 

Please don't underestimate the power of the common citizens.

Why do our political parties think that shutting down the country will help them with their cause? Bandas not only make our lives miserable but also cost our national economy billions of Rupees per day. But of course, our clowns don't care because they are not ones who have to go to work every day and provide for their families with their meager salaries. 

Our clowns get to loot the state treasury. Our clowns waste our taxpayers' money on their medical treatments abroad. Our clowns provide funds to their cadres for so-called development projects. The projects do not bring development anywhere but only develop the bellies of their well-wishers.

I think our political parties should think of new creative ideas to create awareness about their protest programs instead of just shutting down the country and vandalizing vehicles and lashing out at innocent folks. 

Our political parties should take responsibility when their cadres burn vehicles. It would be nice if our Emperor personally compensated the taxi driver whose cab was burned during the banda. After all, he is the only neta who has more money and muscles than the rest of the clowns.

Instead of bandas, our political parties should hire musical bands and invite all citizens for a day of dancing and singing. Our political cadres can make momos, pani puris and sodas and sell it to the general public. That would certainly be a more honest and entertaining way of raising funds for your party instead of just extorting from our byaparis. 

Yes, let's have a carnival like the Brazilians but of course without the Samba unless our Kollywood superstar Rekha Thapa wants to show her dance moves with the Emperor again.

Our Emperor cannot win the hearts and the minds of the people with the usual banda nataks. Why not shoot a YouTube video bobbing your head to the song for the upcoming Nepali movie 'Resham Filili'?

It would be nice if our Emperor, Dr. Saheb and his friends all joined in the fun and show us all that they too know how to have fun instead of just coming up with same old dialogue of threatening to bring hell down upon this beautiful land of ours. Well, we are already living in a hellhole. It can't get worse than this. We have shortages of everything. 

Our byaparis raise their prices every year and continue to sell us adulterated products. Everything goes up except our wages. Millions of our young are forced to go overseas because our incompetent government can't provide neither employment nor any conducive environment to develop entrepreneurs.

We hear that some of the leaders and cadres were not happy with the Emperor's decision to cut short the banda. Our current polygamist Crown Prince is back to updating his Facebook status with the usual guff-suff. 

Junior tells us that it was against the will of the cadres to call off the banda. Well, he should thank the stars above that he is having all the fun because his Daddy is the big boss. 

I think he should just sit down for some coffee with our former Crown Prince and listen to him and get some advice on what not to do to lose the respect of the common folks. We wish both of them well and hope they will be man enough to admit their mistakes, repent and join in the campaign to clean the Bagmati River.

Our Nepali New Year is round the corner and our clowns tell us that they will make maximum efforts to resolve the disputed issues just before the clock strike twelve. Well, the only time our clowns make any effort is when they agree to distribute the loot from the state treasury amongst themselves. 

We seriously need someone to mediate between our clowns. Or maybe we just need to send them for a week long meditation class. Maybe a week of silence will help to clear their minds from all the evil thoughts they seem to have of ruining this country.

We all know that our clowns will not compromise at all. And after the New Year, we will see another round of protest by our opposition wallahs. It will be time for the third phase of the protest programs. 

Hope our Emperor has some magic tricks left in him. Our opposition wallahs need a bigger dhamaka now. We have seen the mass rallies. We have seen the banda natak. What's next? Well, just occupy Singha Durbar and leave us alone to go on with our daily lives. 

We know that 2072 BS will not be a good year for us. Our clowns can't deliver us the new constitution in a few months, or a few years or maybe not for another decade. I think the best option for the good of this country would be to leave the constitution writing process to the young leaders of respective political parties. 

The dirty old men should take a bath in Bagmati and head to Banaras and be hermits instead of being termites and destroying the foundation of this country. 

If Banaras is not a viable option then go to Bodh Gaya or Bethlehem or Burkina Faso. Please, just go away anywhere across the border  and allow us to live in peace!

Saturday, April 4, 2015

Dr KC and the Forty Thieves



We are all glad that Dr Govinda KC has ended his hunger strike after our incompetent government agreed to address his demands. This is the fifth time that KC had to go on a hunger strike and let's hope that our great doctor would not have to put himself through such trouble to be heard in his fight against the chors trying to make billions by opening new medical colleges. 

I think there will be many more hunger strikes by Dr KC in the coming years because our corrupt clowns and civil servants have always been good at breaking promises. Let's hope that the 11-point agreement between Dr KC and our government wallahs will be implemented soon. 

But will our politicians sacrifice the loss of making millions in kickbacks for the good of the country? Nope. They just agree to address the demands to buy some time to figure out how to fool us all. 

Our Emperor and his friends should learn a thing or two from Dr KC. Yes, instead of shutting down the country for three days, why not stage a hunger strike and pressure our ruling clowns   to forge consensus instead of bulldozing the disputed issues in the new constitution through a voting process? 

Dr KC kept on going for 12 days but our corrupt clowns won't last more than two days because they have already developed the habit of gobbling down anything in front of them. I doubt our Emperor can stay hungry for more than a day. It would be really difficult for one to even fast for a day if he needs his daily dose of bideshi whiskey and read meat.

Our political parties are good at signing agreements but then they fail to honor them. We have a trust deficit when it comes our good for nothing freeloaders. We just can't trust these thieves. 

Not all politicians are corrupt. We have a few good ones but it’s probably the forty or so thieves who are taking this country down the drain. So it's us, 30 million honest Nepalis against 40 evil-doers who are hell-bent on taking us to the stone age.

I think it would be better if Dr KC led us all to demand a new constitution as soon as possible. Where are our so-called civil society leaders? Well, they are busy kissing the arses of our politicians. After all, they all seem to be affiliated to one political part or another.

Dr KC is an honest man. Our politicians are not. Dr KC helps needy people. Our clowns loot the funds meant for the poor. Dr KC is a man of integrity whereas our freeloaders have no morals. Dr KC spends his own money to treat the poor whereas our netas use our taxpayers' money to seek treatment abroad. 

Dr KC is worried about the country but our clowns are only worried about their cadres and cousins. Dr KC is tired of corruption in the medical sector and is fighting it alone whereas our so-called leaders have friends who have invested millions of Rupees in opening of new medical colleges.

Many of our politicians seem to have invested their ill-gotten money in medical colleges across the country and they do want to profit from it. The CIAA is busy going after civil servants who are taking in bribes in lakhs of Rupees whereas Lokman Dai doesn't have time to go after those who are minting millions and even billions of Rupees from all sorts of dirty deals.

Yes, we need more medical colleges and more doctors in this land but we can't have colleges without sufficient infrastructures just taking in millions of Rupees in fees and not providing adequate training to medical students. We can't have byapris and netas joining hands to rake in billions of Rupees from tuition fees while turning out doctors who are no better than quacks in our villages.

Our incompetent government can't stop our private transport wallahs, private hospitals and schools and fake-VAT bill byaparis from fleecing passengers, patients, students and consumers. What good is this government if it can't take action against those who are playing with our lives?

I don't think there is anything wrong with our political parties. After all, they attract millions of supporters because they tell us that they will fight against corruption, injustice and make sure that all of us get equal rights and access to opportunities. 

The problem is with our politicians who are not interested to change the system even though they all came to power promising to bring change for the better.

Dr KC has shown us all that one man alone can stand tall and demand changes to the corrupt system. If all of us support folks like Dr KC and take a stand ourselves then our corrupt political players will have no choice but to bow down and implement the much needed changes to make this country better.

Dr KC wants all of us to have better access to affordable healthcare and be treated by well-trained doctors. We need people like him who are selfless human beings who want to bring positive changes to our society. 

We do not need greedy corrupt savages who only think about themselves and do not care if the whole country and its common citizens suffer endlessly.

Dr KC want us all to fight against this corrupt system. He has done his share and it is now up to us to make sure that we are as courageous as him when it comes to fighting against our corrupt clowns.