King Deuba is in New York City and so is our Foreign Minister Mahara but they seem to be lost in the crowd. How come our netas don't make any news when they attend the UN picnic every year? At least give a speech threatening some other country or just come out with fake news about us thinking about developing nuclear weapons as well.
After all we have a few grams of Uranium somewhere in our land, don't we? We don't know how easy it would be to extract it but at least we can threaten to do something with it every now and then and get some respect from the so-called 'thulo' nations!
The world knows that we can't go to war with our chimekis and win but at least if we only threaten to work on developing nukes for our personal home use then our chimekis and the West might take us seriously. Mahara thought he would be meeting Trump but I guess our folks in New York didn't know much about protocol and thought it was like back home where anybody can meet the thulo mancheys like our bideshi ambassadors meet our politicians and civil servants.
Our Ambassador in Amrika can't even meet any US government officials without appointment whereas bidhesis here in Nepal meet our netas like whenever they feel like it and go to their homes and have tea or something. Yes, we Nepalese are friendly folks and guests are Gods! No wonder, bidhesis act like first-class citizens in this land whereas Nepalis get no respect in their own country!
Even our civil servants, cops and corrupt netas seem to like bidhesis more than their fellow citizens. Our civil servants beg for scholarships for their kids and even jobs after retirement. More than 3.5 million Nepali folks are now overseas working hard to provide for their families back home.
But when our folks come back or want to go abroad, our immigration officials harass them and treat them like criminals. Where did we go wrong? Here the corrupt think they are righteous while the honest, hard working and law-abiding citizens have to be ashamed of themselves for being good people!
Our corrupt netas beg for funds for their parties from the bideshis whereas our cops do not carry out 'Mapase' checkings on bideshis and even ignore restaurants opening late if owned by non-Nepalis! Why? Well, our cops seem to be scared to talk to bideshis in English or any other bideshi languages or try to understand what they are saying.
Our cops managed to get hold of gold worth millions of dollars recently but still can't figure out who was the mastermind behind it. Or maybe bideshis are a lot smarter than us and know how to play the game better.
A blue-plated vehicle can park anywhere, hit someone and get away with it. Our DIG Saheb who is more than likely to be our IGP in a year should crack down on buying and selling of blue-plated vehicles among our bidhesi friends who are neither diplomats nor have anything to do with any work that allows you to drive around in a blue-plated vehicle.
If you are a Nepali restaurant owner then expect the cops to come to your establishment, harass you and your guests and threaten to take you to jail for a night.
If you are a bideshi, then the cops will just wait outside till you close your place and won't say much because they are intimidated by other bideshis hanging around and when they see a dozen of blue-plated vehicles outside then they must think that Amriki President Trump and his entourage was here.
Once again, Trump has shown the world that he loves to give nicknames to friends and foes and he is hell bent on putting Amrika first and the rest of us can take a hike. When will we have a politician who talks about putting 'Nepali First' instead of bowing down and kissing our chimekis' arses for their own self-interest.
Trump has called Lil' Kim a Rocket Man who is on a suicide mission whereas Lil' Kim has now fired back and is calling Trump a crazy old person. Well, Trump is a senior citizen and he is crazy in many ways but when will our politicians get nicknames from other world leaders or even from their own band of thieves here at home?
Well, Oli is our national comedian. Prachanda is our Emperor and Deuba is a Maharaja while Dr. Saheb maybe smarty pants but if Trump had his way then our politicians would be called a jack ass, a flip-flopper, a jerk or sons of seedless cucumbers or even worse. For now, Dotard has challenged Rocket Man for a fight.
Thank God, we are at least a few miles away from Lil' Kim but we have to be ready when our chimekis challenge each other for the 'Nuke Games' in the future. It's about time, we go nuclear as well! We may not have the brains to build a bomb for now but even talking about the idea of building one will at least make Trump send us a Dashain greeting!
Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at guffadi.blogspot.com. You may contact him at firstname.lastname@example.org