Wednesday, March 9, 2011

News from Nepal....

Finally, our two UML mantris have their own mantra-layas! Bishnu Poudel will have to do without 'Home' ... now he gets them defence portfolio rey and Tuladhar is our new 'Education' mantri!

Well, Bishnu... don't worry luh! Defence may not be as cool as home ministry but you still can make some money from them 'army ko thekka-patta' ni! Although the army won't come out unless there is them 'President's Rule' ... just have fun hanging out with them generals and drinking whisky @ the Army club!

And Tuladhar can make money as our 'Madeshi' leaders did... by extorting 1-2 lakhs per teacher... if they want them better posting sosting. Or you can hire your own cadres for them 'school teachers' job in them villages! You don't have to show up for work.. you get paid on tyam... and you get to spend your day , drinking chyaang and playing cards with them local leaders rey!

Ani.. hamro government schools haroo ko textbooks publish garnaw pani karod-au ko ... hoinuh Arabau-ko chal-khel hooncha nai!

And SLC is here.... it starts from March 24th till April 1st rey! Hamro youngster haroo lai pani kya bore... April fool's day ma last exam kya! Yo barsa chahi 500,000+ students will be taking their SLC exams rey!

Last year, 64% managed to get past the 'Iron Gate'... hamro paala ma tuh ... it was only 32% hehe... but tyeti bela ahiley jasto 14 ghantey load shedding pani thiye naw ni! So... no batti = increase in passing rate hola ni!

And nowadays.. everybody is getting them 'distinction' .. hamro pala ma .. first division was .. like winning a gold medal in them Olympics! The whole tole sole ma halla.. 'ye falano ko choro tuh khatara.. first division haaney cha mora ley'

We still know Dr. BRB as the 'board first' wallah... even though he has a PhD.. we don't care.. SLC ma first ayo .. pugyo... Baburam could have quit school and it wouldn't have mattered.. he could hang around New Road all day.. and drink local twat but folks would be like ... 'jay bhaye pani board first ho kya'... haha! But he doesn't drink.. maybe he should drink like Prachandey and get all wild and crazy... sometimes!

Abuh yo jawana ma .. kay ko SLC.. scrap it... siddhai 10+2 tiruh laagey bhaye naw bhanya! But I still have my SLC ko result in them golden frame srame.. hahah.. First Division.. taan toon garey raw!

And we have to give it to them politicians in Japan. They either resign, commit hara-kiri or disappear! Japan ko foreign minister, Seiji Maehara has resigned because he accepted $3,000 from some old Korean lady rey!

That's like... only 2 lakh something Rupees kya! Tyo tuh Sorakhutte (Thamel) ko Inspector lay ekai din ma haat paarcha.. hahah!

Japan ko law anoosar... politicians are banned from taking money from foreigners rey! Hamro Nepal ko law anoosar... sorry.. we don't have any law saw kyaaruh! Our politicians will accept money from everywhere.. .Indian, Chinese, Amrikanos, EU... doesn't matter.. Gaddafi lay pani ek dui choti hoondi garey-raw paisa saisa diyo hola ni .. hamro neta haroo lai.. haha!

And Kishunji basney ghar lai abuh ashram banau-ney rey! Lau hai... what kind of ashram would that be... how about a 'club' or a local joint where bachelors are encouraged to attend and mingle with single ladies ... hahah!

That would have made Kishunji proud ni! Or we can open a chiya pasal and a paan bhandar pani! Harek sanibaar.. sabai jana Kishunji ko yaad ma local chiya ruh paan khaadai basoom-la .. ani khiti-titi haa-soom-la! Jai hos!

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