Starting a Co-operative

Back in the days, when I was a teenage were-wolf (hehe!)... my neighborhood was like the 'disneyland' of carpet factories. Every night.... till 2am, them carpet weavers would sing songs while they were working.

Every morning, motorcycles would be zooming around with them wool swool, going for them dye-sye hola. Then .. them Desis started to make 'cheap' carpets ki kay ho... the carpet industry went down the drain.

Everybody was a carpet factory owner in my neighborhood. Only few really made them billions of Rupees. One was our 'Hero' Senon... he looked like Jackie Chan then... so everybody call him 'Hero' kya!

Today, he is the President of Nepali Bowling Association kyaaruh. Well, he owns them hotels and what not ... Hotel Shahenshah kyaaruh! During them 'dingo boots' and 'Pakistani leather jacket days!' (I didn't own either!).... our Senon dai was making deals with Gyanu uncle kyaaruh!

Shahenshah means 'King of Kings' in them Persian language .. Senon dai must have been a big 'Amitabh' fan hola ni. Senon dai is probably the richest Tibetan in Nepal. He came here with nothing and did what he had to do.... so them folks who complain that there is nothing for them here... (like me!) ... should learn to work hard, focus and stop whining and bitching kya!

Now, I might get a free swimming and tennis pass @ Hotel Shahenshah ... hola ni.. hehe!

I still miss my Tibetan friends who have moved to Amrika and Canada ... and them 'carpet' pasals ... now we have them kirana pasals and mobile shops (uglification of the neighborhood!).... and no more gifts during the His Holiness ko birthday etiyaadi.

Anyways, people really did make them money but then everybody wanted to export carpets and the last warriors (the ones who got in at the end!) had to sell their houses and what not to pay back their creditors because there wasn't any market for all of our 'entrepreneurs' by then.

Then... Kathmandu went wild and crazy with them 'taxi' business kyaaruh. Every tole had their own taxi company. The 'Hyundai' taxis were cool but then our great byapari, Binod Chow-dhury decided to bribe them sakari hakims and they let them 'Marutis' be our 'official' taxis in the valley.

Maruti is okay if you are a pygmy (sorry.. with due respect to the 'little people') and if you were to go to the airport then your luggage would need another taxi kya!

Then there were so many taxis around that our entrepreneurs once again failed to make the moolah hola ni. Kathmandu valley ko population then was less than a million .. now it's like 5 million ... and we have like 7,000 taxis!

Then came the garment business and the same story unfolded and now it's the 'co-operative' thing ... and in the next few years, thousands of them will fold and millions of us will lose our savings pani!

According to our dailies, there are now 22,646 cooperatives operating in the country rey! And nearly 10% of them co-operatives have annual transactions of more than Rs 500 million rey! 50 crores a year.... ani kinuh naw-bhagos sabai paisa liyeruh tyee mora haroo!

Co-operatives are supposed to help them members not make them so-called promoters wealthy kya. Lot of them co-operatives invested them deposits in Jagga-sagga and made tons of money. The depositor got his usual '8%' interest while them promoters made 1,000% from the jagga flipping natak!

Now.. our jagga-dalals can't afford to go to them 'dance bars' every night and spend 50,000 in one night rey. They even don't want to rack up 100,000 kms in their tiny Santro Wantro gaadi pani.

And our co-operatives are now offering them 15% interest and we think we will make 'easy money' off them interest etiyaadi. And let us not forget them 'Unity' scam-wallahs who duped them 300,000 poor villagers and 'fresh-off-the-bus' Kathmanduites!

Yes... at the end of the day, them Unity-wallahs made like 60 million Amriki dollars, promising them folks.. that they would get 100% return on their investment in like.. 3 years and free medical and life insurance etiyaadi if they deposited Rs 15,000.00 with Unity!

Well, there is a 'Unity' tower in my neighborhood .. and it's been vacant since the scamsters fled. And our President, great chairman Prachandoo and even Makune were felicitated by these fraudsters .. so I guess they got them 'free gift' vouchers pani hola.. and that's why the main crew behind the scam are still free till this day!

Few months ago, a dear old friend of mine called me and asked me for a favor. I had to sign them bidhaan siddhaan. He was starting a co-operative rey. He's a nice bloke, recently got married and his wife works for one of them finance companies.

And them all 'naari' samuha would be running them co-operative rey. So, I said.. why not.. I will buy some shares because I would rather trust women (except Sujata auntie) to get it right than our Nepali men (including me!).

Well, he needed 25 people to sign them registration papers. I did and so did other folks in the neighborhood. Our government has changed the policy now. Today, you need 125 folks and their nagarikta to open a co-operative kyaaruh.

Well, it's already been a month now. The co-operative has a office nearby and my friend is the MD rey. And so far, he hasn't asked me to buy them shares. I hope he does call me soon so I can invest in them 'all-women' co-operative (with the 'naara' MD!) ... or maybe he just needed one 'extra' person to sign them papers ni.

Anyways, good luck and God Bless.. .hehe! I think they must have been scared of my 'co-opeartive' ideas ... like, private taxis for the neighborhood (so that we don't get ripped off by them meter-wallahs!), vegetable and food sood, gas sas ko home delivery service etiyaadi... even the local veggie sellers seem to rip us off!

I am a member of an informal co-operative (not registered), started by my sister's employees. I pitch in Rs 500 a month. It's now at Rs 14,500.00 rey. This month, I am supposed to deposit Rs 5,500.00 and make it 20 grand rey. And then our co-op will have like Rs 10 lakhs.

They have like 50 members now and all they talk about is ... maybe invest them money soney in some jagga somewhere! Why don't we sell vegetables and flowers and maida and fal-fool ni baroo? Or we can open a 'Aloo-dum' place and a vyar vyar momo thing as well... ki kaso?