Wednesday, September 7, 2011

No Honking, Please....


Kathmandu ko bato tyehi nai ho but in the last five years, them motorbikes haroo chahi babal-ai badya chan hai. There are now more than 400,000 bikes in the valley ani aroo gaadi saadi and not to forget them big-arse buses and them mini-ones... sabai 25+ years budo gaadi haroo!

The bike-wallahs honk like crazy and them big buses get irrtiated by them tyampoos and start blowing their horns as if the tyampoo will grow wings and fly kya. Anyways, our new PM, Babuji has decided that from now onwards them honking sonking and siren blaring nataks by them security wallahs escorting our PM saheb will stop rey.

And to make it easier for us, he will not be driven around during them rush hour pani... at least Baburam feels the pain unlike them other chor mantris who haven't let go off them Karod-ko-gaadis and them siren blaring security-wallahs.

I think Baburam should go a step further and start using public vehicles. Baroo 4-5 jana security liyeruh hiday hooncha hagi. Then he will not only win the hearts and minds of Kathmanduites but all Nepalis who have to koaching in them public vehicles. I hope he gets a discount when he takes out his PM card or something... hehe!

I think it's about tyam all them big-arse buses, mini-buses are banned inside the valley kya. Bato nai chaina, euta thulo bus ayo bhaney, bato nai banda hooncha. But that won't be happening because in this 'New' Nepal, them mafias run the show. They can get away with anything while the public suffers from their stupid nataks.

Them smugglers in Butwal shut down the markets because the SP saheb confiscated them smuggled boras of rice rey. Our Home Minister is one of the most corrupt daka ever but he has promised to act tough and corruption lai zero ma lya-u-ney rey... hehe!

Abuh Home Minister nai sabai bhanda thulo daka bhaye pachi ... police-wallah lay kay kaam garcha? The SP in Butwal is getting them calls from our 'homie' to let go off them criminals and their smuggled goods. All them smugglers are calling them politicians to transfer SP Basnet as soon as possible rey. Yestai ho Naya Nepal ma... Ganatantra hoinuh, Goonda-tantra ho kya.

Let's talk about them goondas and our Homie Minister some other day hai. Sometimes, you do have to honk or else the crazy wacko who is walking in the middle of the street won't care to make way for your vehicle ni.

Mero ghar cheu ma, NCell ko van always shows up at their office gate and then honk sonk soo-roo .. rati ko 12 bajey. Atti nai bhayo ... so I had to get out of the house with my thulo danda (latthi ni feri!) and kindly requested the driver saheb to stop honking everyday at midnight or else he can see my 'Laathi Charge' demonstration.. hehe!

The driver blamed the security guard who was busy sleeping inside. So I kicked them gates and after five minutes of acting like a mad man (my feet hurt!) .... our security dai wakes up and opens the gate. Once again, I kindly requested him to please open the gate at midnight for them NCell ko office vehicle or else I might have to teach him how to play dandi-biyo.

Asti .. I was walking around and somebody was honking like crazy.... for like 5 minutes... I couldn't take it and ran towards the vehicle to grab the driver saheb ko collar sollar... afnai saathi po parecha.... so I guess, sometimes honking also means 'Hello!' instead of 'Hurry Up or I will shit my pants' ...hehe!

Anyways, hami janta lai kay matlab hagi.... Kathmandu is once again turning into a garbarge city... we don't care! Jhallu Baba and them former prime-monsters are driving around in them 1+ Karod ko gaadi... we don't care! And them good-paak stores in New Road are selling them dhal-ko-pani ma paka-ko , sadey-ko mithai batuh banako goodpaak... well they got caught but tyehi ho 5-10,000 hajaar fine tircha ani feri khel soo-roo!

Baburam dai, please be like Mr. Lee from Singapore kya. Abuh caning saning (korra bhancha ni Nepali ma!) and ali badi fine sine tirau-noo paryo hamra daka sahuji haroo lai! Ki chai... Chinese torture bhanya jhai... 'Honking' torture diney ho ki. Sabai chor fata-ha lai bus park ma lagey-ruh baan-ney ani 102 wata truck sruck ko honk sonk soo-nai dim-naw... ki kaso?

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