Thursday, September 15, 2011

The Land of Expos...


Every other day, there is some Expo somewhere in the valley. We had them 'Soon-chadi' (jewelry) exhibition some time ago. Now our 'Teej' ladies are thinking twice about buying them soon-noon... tola ko nai 50k rey. I think they will stick to iPhones hola...hehe!

Then we had them real estate expo natak. All I saw was them big-arse cement-pakauney truck and them stalls selling apartments and what not. I think only the byaparis, civil servants and netas can afford them ghar shar these days.

We are Nepalis and we still do want to live in a house not them apartments kya. Most of them buyers are either speculators or byaparis who need to find a new pad for their mistresses .. hehe! Well, many folks have sold their jagga sagga inside the valley and moved to them so-called housing colonies kyaaruh. I think it's much safer than worrying about them batti, paani and burglaries ni.

And them homes at them colonies are really expensive. Everything is priced above 1 crore and up. Who has that kind of money? Even if you get them bank loans, you still need to sell them APCs or adulterated products to make them payments...hehe!

And just last week, we had them 'Auto' show where they booked like 30 crores ko gaadi saadi rey. Even a Tata Nano costs like 10 lakhs here in Nepal ... aroo gaadi ko tuh kurai chaa-doom! Only dalals and dons can afford them vehicles kya or thank your ancestors for somehow getting hold of ropanis of land in Kathmandu.. abuh tyehi paisa lay kinney ni gaadi ruh saadi!

I have a friend who has a 16 lakhs ko bike sike. I told him that he was a fool and he should have bought a taxi and I would have driven it at night tyam and he could have gotten a decent return on investment ni.

Abuh tyo motorbike kaha kudau-nay... tyehi KTM-Bhaktapur ko bato ma uda-ye matra ho... ani bike bhaye pachi maiya pani pauney bhanthyo.. tyo hamro 'first' Nepali rapper, Ratan Subedi lay.. hehe!

Well, he is still looking for Miss Right rey.. and I think he might need to sell his house in New Road and buy a Rolls Royce hola... kinnuh bhaney the fool thinks he is very fair and hensum and wants to marry some fashion model in New York rey.

Pahila tuh NYC janoo paryo, ani po bhetcha ni usko sapana ko raani. New Road ko Gudpak pasal agaadi basey-ruh hooncha ruh?

And today, them 'Money' expo ends kyaaruh. What's next? Maybe we should have a 'Food' expo where only vendors who sell safe and unadulterated stuff can book them stalls kya.

Nowadays, you can't eat them gudpaks because it's all mixed with dhawl ko paani. It's not safe to drink them bottled water because it's not even filtered rey. Even them cooking oil and BMC masala pani nakkali rey. Neta haroo nai nakkali bhaye pachi... aroo lai kay bhanney?

Everything is adulterated in this land ... from politics to paani... and all them gudpak lovers must be really suffering from them withdrawal symptoms hola hagi.

But nearly 99% of them folks lay tuh sabai pachai sakyo hola ni. So.. if you switch to clean drinking water and non-re-mixed food then you might instead suffer from them pet-dhooking kya!

Even them veggies and fish sish .. sabai ma chemical semical... abuh kay khaney khoi... we can't just starve to death ni... baroo, sabai kura lai ramro sang-aw safa paani lay dhoo-nay ani just pressure cookerize all them stuff. I don't think that would work for gudpaks hola..hehe!

No more frying , no masala-dawling, just boiling soiling.. hehe! Sabai hot-pot khaney kya.... or you can just eat them all and pachau-it with biray-noon or hajmola! If you were a loyal 'gudpak' fan then don't worry... you can eat anything hai!

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