Friday, September 9, 2011

Dos & Don'ts......

A teenager is in jail for trying to take used bullets with him all the way to England. If you are an Indian hijacker than you can carry them guns, grenades and what not and get away with it but if you are a Nepali then don't even think of carrying a gule-li (catapult) hai.

The teen wanted to make a locket socket rey... from the used bullets.. baroo arko choti chahi locket bana-yeruh , ani afno check-in ma rakhney ni! Poor guy... bekkar ma hamro mamaghar ma bas-noo parya-cha.

He just didn't know them rules and regulations rey. And our patrakars should first verify with them cops kya.... jpt news print naw-garoom... they first reported that our bhai had a pistol and live bullets and even our stupid cops are going around saying that the lad was planning to use them bullets to extort them NRNs in UK rey.

Abuh London ma Chinese pistol paucha-ki kya ho, ki chahi hamro bhai lay bandook-ai bina dui-ta bullet lay matra tarsau-ney plan garya hoon tuh? Nepal Police ka chor haroo pani guff haa-nnaw tuh khappis rahechan hagi!

Youth Association Nepal ko big boss, Mahesh Basnet needs to get his arse kicked or else he will go around doing them chakka jaams and what not ... all over Nepal kya. Our Home Minister, Bijaya dai admitted that he had only 'one' Don in his party rey and made fun of other parties and their hundreds of mundrey goondas.

At least our ghoos-khori Guccha-dar was being honest ni. Kavre-li Don Ganesh Lama is a central commitee member of his party kya. Ganesh is now into the big leagues. He is a 'A' class contractor and he made crores from the thekka-patta , tyo six-lane naya bato cha ni Kathmandu to Bhaktapur ko... uskai kaam ho.. ani kinuh naw-bigros tuh bato ... hehe!

And this really ticked off our UML goondas, especially our clown, Mahesh Basnet. Basnet bro plans to do a protest rally at 3pm in Baag Bazar then chakka jaam at 4pm in Ratnapark and then hand over his 'protest' letter to our PM at 5pm rey.

Kaam na-paako bahula rahecha yee Mahesh Kazi tuh. If he's not happy with them netas then why not gather his goons and ask the opposing mundrey goondas to battle it out ni. Baroo, fight sight khel-noo ani jasley jityo tyes-ley sabai tender sender haat parcha ni. Kinuh hami janta lai dookh-aw diney ho yee bajiya haroo lay?

And our Mao-buddies are at it again... yes, them 'volunary donation' nataks kya. Our comrades have been raising money from nearly everyone in Gorkha for some kind of a get-together of them top comrades. Our PM is also attending the bhoj shoj ... so I guess he won't be in Kathmandu to receive Mahesh Basnet's letter ... hehe!

I don't know why them comrades always ask for money to organize their own events. Tyet-ro paisa lootya chai sabai Prachandoo ko goji ma matra janey ho ki kya ho? They have collected them so-called 'donations' from teachers, byaparis and even government employees rey.

According to them dailies, the comrades decided to accept voluntary donations above five Rupees rey. Tyeso bhaye, sabai Gorkhali haroo sangaw 5 rupaiya chahi jabar-jasti liye rahechan ni.

And them contribution price chart chai yes prakar ka chan... If you teach them first graders, then you better pay them Rs 500, if you are teaching them 5th graders then the price goes up to Rs 700 and if you are teaching them high schoolers then your voluntary donation chai Rs 1,000.00 rey.

Yo tuh see-rif government schools ko laagi, if you are teaching at them private boarding schools then you pay Rs 2,000.00 and them byaparis and even our government wallahs like them VDC secretaries ko bhaag ma chahi Rs 5,000.00 rey.

I think Smart Telecom, them Singaporean company financing them foreign visits by our Prachandoo sarkar should sponsor all them Mao-baddy events ni baroo. Desh ko economy chahi dama-dole .... ani food prices always going up, milk-fuel-pani-batti shortages ... and yet our comrades think we have them money soney to fund their stupid picnics!

Abuh Nepal ko national animal chai tyehi 'mouse' lai banai-dim naw. Usko nam 'Ramu' nai rakh-dim pani. Ramu should be our official mascot kya. Ramu has escaped, even after being stuck to a glue mat for four hours rey. Well, I hope he has finally gotten out of the airport and is busy visiting Ocean Park in Hong Kong ... hehe!

What were them Hongkies doing for four hours.. snapping them pictures and videos and uploading it on Youtube ki kay ho? So, our NAC plane is grounded for another day. Abuh Kathmandu ko moosa lai tyo glue slue lay hooncha... New Road ko good-paak tuh pachau-ney lai tuh tyehi good-paak ko bora plane ma rakhnoo parcha ani... chirey pachi Nepal firta lyaam hai.

Then, we build a nice pad for him @ our Presidential Palace and he can stay with our Prezzie... the another Ramu ni. And if our moosa is a 'she' then we name her 'Sujata' hai. Yestai cha Nepal ko haal-khabar... and thanks for supporting Guffadi ko guff... hehe!