Monday, October 3, 2011

Coming Home...

Today is Fulpati... all them offices shut down for the whole week and folks head home .. from Kathmandu or India or wherever.

Our civil servants will be busy at home, doing them math sath ..... they not only get Dashain bonus from the state but also from byaparis and other shady clowns ni. Uni haroo lai tuh jahiley pani Dashain kya.

Our byaparis are still trying to figure out how to push them sales because not many folks are spending their dough rey. Abuh paisa sabai chor-neta, chor-police ruh chor-contractors haroo sangaw matra cha .. ani Khasa ko looga ruh Nepali raksi kaha bikri hooncha tuh?

Them domestic liquor sales are down rey. Either Nepalis are into fruit salads and Ghirau-la ko juice this Dashain or maybe they have decided to brew their own stuff hola ni. The liquor store near my house is ek damai busy. I guess the sahuji is the only one who is doing 'khatara' businesses this Dashain.

I went to get tyo naya 'thulo' Coke today. There were like 50 folks crammed inside. Everybody was grabbing them bideshi raksis. Yeso hay-ray ko.... most of them were civil servants, police-wallahs and sano tino dalaals.

So I just ran away with a bottle of Coke (I did shout 'Lau Sahuji, pachi hai on my way out kyaaruh!).

Every year, hundreds of thousands of Nepalis working in India, come back home for Dashain. They don't make much, average savings tyehi ho 10-20,000 hajar ICs kya. But them Desi border security wallahs ask for 'Pan-Paraag' kharcha rey.

Thirty years ago, them Indian police-wallahs used to ask for a bee-dee or euta churot. Nowadays, it's like 100 Rupees (IC) or they grab your stuff and ask you to go home without your poko. Abuh tir-nai paryo ni.

Our government, them CDOs and police-wallahs don't care because they also want some chiya kharcha when them workers cross the border and step into our own land kya.

Kathmandu will be a little less crowded from today onwards. Many years ago, it used to be empty, like a ghost town but ahiley tuh manchey pani dherai chan and thanks to our Mao-buddies, remittance and what not... everyone seems to have a house in the valley .. hehe!

While the working class folks head home for Dashain, our byaparis go to foreign lands for them vacations. All our Marwaari byaparis are not in the country right now. Most of them have left for them ASEAN cities rey... tyehi BKK, KL, Singapura etiyaadi.

Some have gone to Europe ani Amrika. They do need a break ni... they do work hard all year round, keeping two sets of books. One for the government and one for their grandfathers. Yes, all them big business houses ma, the chairman will be some 'old' buda who started it all by opening a pasal in New Road during the 'Rana' days ..hehe!

Our comrades will not be having a happy Dashain. Well, the PLA combatants got a pay raise... they will be getting Rs 1,500 more rey ... feri tyo pani Shree 'Aath' (8) Sarkar, Prachandoo ko dhukuti ma jaaney hola ni?

The 'Baidya' gang are trying to figure out what to do. The Masaley joo-loos is not really doing anything and nobody is in town during Dashain ni. Everybody is back to their villages, enjoying the rotey-ping , khasi ko masoo ani dancing prancing etiyaadi. It would be very tough to hire folks to do some andolan for Rs 200 and a plate of masu bhat during this tyam kya.

Baburam dai will be visiting India soon. So, he's busy sending emails to his JNU pals hola. Yes, them reunions are always fun whereas our Prachandoo Sarkar just wants to go to some resort and disappear. He is not going to do anything until November 30th and when the CA term finally ends... he can tell everyone 'see, even Baburam, the smarty pants failed...'

Hope everyone is having a fun Dashain. I just finished cleaning up my room... it was fun! Please don't drink till you drop dead or eat till your gas-ticked pet phooting hai. And if you really have to gamble then make sure that you play them 'small' point-wallah games ... hehe!


  1. People celebrate Dashain way better in Nepal than they do in India. Here people are like vegetarians and teetotalers for a week, and there's no marriage parties. And you only get the 10th day off from work.

  2. kharcha pani is always a diseases for them at the borders to fill their filthy Pocket...

  3. @Kay... ho ruh? Nepal ma tuh, we eat like the world will end after Dashain and we gamble like them Pandavas in Mahabharata..hehe! I think our brothers and sisters would save some money if we followed our Desi bhais and bahens' formula baroo!

    @lhamo... yes, we don't get no respect , border ma ya them immigration desk around the world... thanks to our jackasses (netas) and their nataks. They have made us beggars in front of the whole world.. hehe!