Guff Suff... the real stuff!

There is a tea shop in my neighborhood. It's right next to the Chautari. I didn't realize it was a chiya pasal. Well, it took me 360 days (less than a year!) to figure out that the wood shed was not a squatter's pad but a nice little place where even Red Riding Hood and the bad wolf get along, drinking special Nepalese tea and Aloo-poori! And this cozy corner reminds village folks of their own little village tea shop.

Why? Because the guy uses wood to cook things up. No gas, no kerosene... real wood from the forest. Yes, in the middle of Kathmandu... you can get the 'village people' feeling. I decided to drink plain old black-tea. Well, the guy was trying to be nice... especially as it's cold, he put some masala and maybe a little too much and I felt like I was drinking Curry-tea!

Tea shops in KTM are great place to listen to the guff suffs. A Taxi driver was saying, "Prachanda won't be in Baluwatar next week... The Kangaroos (Congressis) and the UML are planning to join forces and make KP Oli the PM!"

The other smart-arse then quipped in, "And if Girija was still the PM, then we wouldn't have load shedding at all."

How's that? Well, according to this son of a seedless cucumber, India loves Girija and vice versa and the Desis would do anything to give Girija a hard on!

Then the conversation became all political. We live in a great nation. Everyone is so politically aware that it seems that 601 buffoons (meant that in a good way!) are not enough to write our new constitution. And when would the new constitution be ready? Well, how about... a day before the world ends!

For a moment, I thought things would now escalate into a fist fight. I was betting on the taxi driver. He was fat (sorry...big!), fugly and looked like he could punch a hole in your skull. But you never know, the other guy looked like he had a secret weapon. Well, you can get an Indian home-made pistol for a couple of grand these days.

Then somebody changed the topic. "Who is the happiest man in Nepal?" I wish I had some of our feminist sisters with us. Maybe they would have given this MCP a nice verbal beating. Our feminist sisters are all busy working for NGOs and INGOs... they don't have the free time like us, males ...drinking tea and talking BS!

We may all have different political beliefs but everyone in the tea shop had the same answer. Yes, it is no other than our former King, Mr. G! He is having a whale of a time, smoking hookah, writing his autobiography , eating Badel ko masu and watching the city from his Nagarjuna lodge. I guess no one can call him 'Nero' again!

And talking about Mr. G ... he's back in the news. He has expressed concern over the recent Pashupatinath natak. If he's supposed to be a common citizen then why are our journalists still writing about what he thinks or feels? We all know our patrakars have nothing better to do but if every citizen's concern is put into print then our national daily would be 28 million pages long.

I haven't watched Ghajini yet. But it's breaking Bollywood Box Office records... that's what I hear! I think Aamir Khan is setting a bad example to South Asian kids. Don't fall into this trap... don't destory your body with 36-pack abs. You can never beat the goons with that kind of a body. Annie get your gun! Yes, you need a gun and if you hook up with a gal named Annie then it's double the fun!

No, I have no plans of opening up a NRA (National Rifle Association) chapter in Nepal but with the level of goonda-gardi growing each day, I think we will be hearing "right to bear arms" stuff in our Constituent Ass(embly) meeting soon!

And Uncle Mark says, "be good... and be lonesome."