Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Why do people give up?

I have been visiting hospitals, Patan, Himal, Star ..... by the time I am done, I will probably know all the nurses at them ICUs hola. Most of them are busy guffa-maaring and texting. It really pisses me off but that's how we do it here in Nepal hola!

A lover-boy stabbed himself ... pet maa.... because he had a fight with his girlfriend. Now, his relatives want to send her to jail for inspiring Romeo to kill himself rey. I told them... 'Maybe Romeo needs to visit a Shrink and get some therapy baroo'! Yes, he was depressed and he liked to cut himself now and then rey. Abuh counseling garney, psychiatrist ka janoo parcha ni. Arka ko chori lai gaali garey ruh hooncha ruh? 

I seriously need to stop speaking without thinking hola. When I was young, it was a good thing.... them folks liked me because I was the only guy who would say something really stupid and mean it.. whereas the rest of them so-called yuppies only quoted them graduate school ko notes! But now, I am getting old and people think I am crazy. I think I will just be a monk. Then they will call me 'Ye.. that old crazy monk'!

Saathi ko Uncle committed suicide yesterday. Went to Pashupati ..... I stopped going to them temples and puja stuff after I read Laxmi Dai ko poem 'Kun Mandir ma Janchau Yatri' when I was like 11 kyaaruh.... I have been to Pashupati like 8 times this year, tyo pani sabai cremation ko laagi matruh. Our chimkeis don't get along at all but weddings and funerals ma chahi...we have them 'mandatory' attendance rule for tole-baasis kyaaruh!

Let's get back to the 'suicide' story..... 'Mero Uncle ..... very ambitious man.... suicide note ma pani aroo lay badi paisa kama-yo bhaneruh lekh-cha  bahula ley!'..... my friend was pissed at his (late) uncle. The man is dead. He is burning but everybody is cursing him. He leaves behind two kids and a wife and a few mistresses as well. Uncleji was a byapari but he was not happy rey. He was always comparing himself with his friends who had better gaadis, badi paisa and dherai jagga sagga in the valley.

Ghanta ko compare.... euta sano ghar, dui-tin chaak khanuh paye pugi halyo ni. Just because you drive a 1 crore ko gaadi doesn't mean you are better than the rest of us.... 10 karod hos ki 100 rupaiya... lastuh ma raati ghar ma daal-bhat nai khaney ho hami sabai lay! Well some people like roti or crackers but harek din caviar khaney tuh koi chaina hola ni?

Soon ko khaat ma sootay pani, paraal ma sootay pani... nindra ko pani class hooncha ruh? I was once at this joint and arko table ma Paris Hilton ko Nepali cousins haroo ko guff chal-dai thiyo....  who gives a rat's arse about your LV bag or Gucci or your vacation in Paris? If you can afford it then good for you but stop acting like you are embarrassed to live here ni. 

Ye... got carried away rahecha... anyways.... yes, we all need some dough .... because at the end of the day, we need to pay them bills kyaaruh. But why do you want to compete with your friends? Saathi bhanya saathi nai ho. Garib hos ya Dhani.. Juddha Shusmsher ko nati ko nati hos ya kun chai gau ko damai ko choro. 

Kamal dai talks about 'Hindu' rastra.... but I don't want it. I don't even want Nepali as our national language or cow sow as our national animal. I think we should just watch Avatar and start speaking Na'vi ki kaso. Ani rastra janawar chai.. dog nai hoonoo parcha kya! And if you adopt a stray dog then you get one free cooking gas cylinder per month kya!

I think we should just get rid of all them caste saste..... and go with numbers hagi. Yes, Facebook ma... we see them 'Nepal' or 'Nepali' as last name etiyaadi. Abuh Madhav Nepal lay chahi kay garney ni ... he would be Madhav Nepal Square hola ni..... Yes, we are all Nepali now. We were Nepalese a decade ago. And by 2020, we will be khoi.... I don't know.... desh pani hooncha ki hoodai-nuh?

Abuh numbers game soo-roo garyo bhaney chai... it would be fun to introduce yourself as 'I am 3879144' ..... ani lastuh ko 30 million something pugda tuh... babal nai hooncha hola. Okay, not a good idea hagi! Maybe we need to form a group or something.... if a woman gets beaten up in some village and the villagers are forcing her to eat them goo-moot because they think she is a witch.. then we should all go to that village and do the same to all them nautankis ni! 

I don't support them death penalty stuff... but human traffickers (be it them cheli-beti bechney ya hamra manpower ka chor haroo!) and them so-called 'witch' hunters haroo lai chahi ......I wouldn't mind hola!

Yesterday, I went to visit my tole-baasi and his wife ... dui jana nai ICU maa. His wife burned herself by khaw-naa-ing matti-tel and lighting up. He lives in Canada and he was back to visit his wife and kids. He wants to take them to Canada soon but of course all them paper saper takes time ni. Usko shrimati lay bujhey-nuh..... yes paali jasari bhaye pani liyeruh jaanoo parcha haam-lai bhaney cha. Ali Ali thaak thook .... and then she goes into the kitchen and burns herself. He tried to save her..... usko pani haat, chaati ma burn surn rahecha! But he is doing fine... ICU ma cha taruh .. he can walk around!

But his wife won't survive. The doctors say '25% chance cha... but we are not optimistic' ... it's just a matter of time.... but how do I console him? This woman was the love of his life. They left their families, eloped and started a new life together. They were both happy until he decided to go to Canada. But all them tole-baasis felt sorry for him and blamed his wife. 'Kasto naw-bujey ko hola hagi?' ... 'Usley pani Samjhaunu parcha ni' .... or maybe there was something else.... we will never know! But why do we start all them hawa-tari guff..... even when folks are dying kya?

The lover-boy will recover..... his surgery went well but he needs some serious help! Uncle ji wanted to leave this world because he was angry at all them folks who made more, ate more.. had more than him. I cannot do much for my tole-baasi except pray for him and his wife. Why do some people give up and think things won't get better? 

I get depressed every other week but even though I complain too much about everything..... I don't want to give up! When my time is up and it's time to go.... then I will be ready. 

I don't know how it will end, a plane crash, a car accident, health problems or old age..... or alien abduction... but I ain't giving up and ending it unless I am on ventilation and am brain dead.. then it's better to turn the switch off hola but until then.... I want to wake up and smell the Bagmati river (hamro tiruh tuh Mal-pokhari, Nakkhu) no matter how difficult it is!

Yes.. it's hard sometimes..... but yestai tuh ho ni.... yo zindagani!


  1. Wish every single person reads this article! really touching. Thank you. Keep up the good work :)