Sunday, September 5, 2010

Give them a break... will ya?


Mr. Karki (dah UML MP) is in jail... for what? Asking some fellow citizen to dole out some dough for some sarkari jaagir is not a crime. It's been going on since the original Maobadi, Mr. PN from Gorkha decided to crash the 'Newar Fest' in the Valley!

The price tag is : IGP ko laagi Rs 5 corores, NEA ko director ko laagi Rs 7 corores and so on.

And if somebody wants to sell his land in some village and give Rs 2-3 lakhs to some MP to become a Police Inspector... no problemo? Ani Inspector saheb lay kinuh na-khaa-wos tuh ghoos? The Mao Inc. is planning to buy the Madeshi MPs for 1 corore a piece. So why is Mr. Karki in Jail? Poor fellow or should we say... unlucky bastard!

According to our special classified bulletin from KGB (Kukhurachor Guptachar Bivaag), Mao Inc. is really making a killing in real-estate deals. The story is... Prachandu Uncle's Saala and his friends recently bought some land in Butwal. The price tag: Rs 23 corores (wow!)... but they paid off the Jagga-Dhani only Rs 14corores. And when the seller asked them the rest, they replied, "You want to live, don't you?" ... Stupid fellow... he should thank the Gods above that these Communist businessmen didn't just take the property and buried him somewhere in Chitwan!

And our Crown Prince is really living the good life... no, I am not talking about Paras. He is busy hanging out in Terai. I guess the people in the South are the only folks really wanting the Monarchy to make a comeback! What about the Northerners? Well, they are busy shooting arrows and dancing in circles in Tundikhel!

Prakash Dahal aka the Current Crown Prince (CCP) has partnered with the ex-Crown Prince's brother-in-law. What are they upto? Well, they are planning to open a casino in Hotel Vaishali. Slot business rey... And Mr. G's jwai-saheb better get some good people. Why is he hanging out with dance-bar girls?

Nothing wrong with having six dance-bar dancers around you. (maybe Mr. Singh can do some 'Zumba' and be fit-wit soniye or something.. but with them so much cash, entourage pani ali hi-fi bhaye hoonthyo ni ... hoina ruh? If I were to be his PA, I would be calling up Kim Kardashian or some Bollywood item numbers to give Mr. Singh, a good tase of high life or something. Maybe just call P. Diddy and ask him to show jwai-saheb how to have a good time!

And please... people, let's stop making fun of the Maoists! Prachandu Uncle is really in love with Dhulikhel. Hope he pays the bills @ them resorts where he hangs out whenever he needs some serious quality time!

We all know by now that our Kangaroos (Congressis), Unidentified Moronic Losers (UML) and the Pancheys are nothing but blood-sucking vampires but we never thought the so-called Revolutionaries , the Mao Inc. would be such great players... and hip-hop lingo ma chahi, how do our TV channels get hold of their mix-tapes... before it was MC Prachandu and his 'We just really rolled them UNMIN beaches didn't we?' single and now we have Mr. Mahara and his 'Chinaman, give me 500million so that we can dimsum them Madeshis' song!

The Maoists blame the whole world for all their troubles. So let us all give them a break.... we hope they do give us a 'big bang' natak they have been promising us all along... We need the Maoists back in power so that Kathmandu ko jagga price will be more expensive than New York or Tokyo or Mumbai and maybe the Crown Prince can partner with Donald Trump and Jwai-saheb can hang out with Miss Universe Contestants!

Ajuh lai yeti nai, jai hos!

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