Wednesday, September 15, 2010

The World This Week!

A driver runs over a child... highway ma chakka-jaam! While the parents and the company negotiates over compensation, angry mob throws the driver in the river... abuh kay? Now the parents won't be getting the money unless the driver is found rey... Nepal ma no law and order ... actually Nepal ma Jungali law and order chahi cha hai!

Biggie used to say 'Mo money , Mo problems' rey... Haatti ruh Haatti Chap Chapal eutai ho bhaney jastai... Nepal ma chahi... "bigger the ride, bigger the problem' rey! If you are a truck driver then the only way you can get away with accidents.... u better hit a helicopter or a plane or else you will get thrown into some river!

For example: If a truck hits a micro-bus then it becomes truck-wallah ko fault.. if a Micro-bus hits a motorcycle then it becomes Micro-bus driver ko fault... and if a bike hits a cycle then the biker ko fault! Abuh thaha bhayo hola ni Nepal ko system!

The other day, mero saathi ko Father-in-Law ko gaadi Teaching Aspawtaal agaadi goodi-raheko thiyo.. Achanak euta mahila gaadi agaadi aunoo bhayo ruh thuppa rokhnoo bhayo, ani Gaadi side laagnuh khojda uha feri gaadi agaadi aunoo bhayo or choossssaawww gaadi lay choo-aye cha! Ani tuh Babal!

Suddenly, out of nowhere ... a crowd of 50 angry young men and women gathered around the vehicle and started shouting 'Down with Samanti haroo' or something like that! The driver got out of the vehicle, so did the Father-in-Law and then some wise-arse shouted 'Lau hay-ruh Yee saala haroo kati bhaata , bhakkar ko bhakkar drive garney manchey pachadi ani arko manchey lai driver banayo!'

The lady was taken to Teaching Hospital. The doctors couldn't find anything wrong with her except a love-bite by her former lover during the first Jana Andolan back in 2046 B.S. rey! Then the woman refused further inspection by the witch-doctors and asked to be driven to B&B Hospital. And then finally she was all fine and dandy and demanded Rs 10,000.00!

After brutal negotiation, the price was dropped to Rs 2,500.00 ! She left, nobody got hurt, the vehicle wasn't torched! Aamir khan lay bhanya jastai 'Awl is Vell'

Nepal ma yestai ho! Ani arko chaak-h-laagdo news chahi ... Maoist (Lover!) Commander commits suicide! And you thought them Maoists were only after your house, jagga, gaadi and soon chaadi! Maoist haroo pani lob sob gardaa rahechan bhanda dherai manchey haroo awe-chumm-a manchan! Kukur ko tuh lob parcha bhaney manchey ko kay lob napaw-ray-ruh sob sob matra hooncha tuh?

May his soul rest in peace.... and hope he finds a better bride in his next life! Aroo yestai ho... Our Home Minister is flying to New York to represent Nepal for them UN ko annual bhoj karyakaram. Abuh Home Minister Home ma naw-baw-say-ruh ghanta khanuh bidesh sidesh gaako?

Ani, hamro Forest Minister, Mr. Sack (Bohara) is in New York for some climate slimate conference. Jungle ma po basnoo parney ho... hoonuh tuh NYC pani tuh (Concrete) Jungle nai ho kyaruh!

Lau, Jai Hos!

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