Thursday, February 5, 2009

Catfight !

I have seen White women duke it out with each other. And Black chicks can really go all out like them WWE stuff but Nepalese ladies ... never seen young Nepali girls wanting to punch each other in God knows where?

Was at this Cafe, trying to act as if I was a smart NGO guy , writing important stuff so that I could stop global warming single-handedly. Actually I was just checking if my naari-friend had finally decided to put me back on her Hi5 list. Well, she hasn't yet... I guess it's over when she says, 'It's over...fool'

I never could figure out what the story was but suddenly the girl sitting on my right, with her 'Fabio' like boy toy was all pumped up. She was cursing, bitching about some other girl.

The last time I ever heard a Nepali woman barking like a dog was when I was a kid and my lola missed this cute neighbor of mine and instead landed on her granny's bum. And then the old woman exploded ... "Ye Mya Chi Te La".

It took a while to sink in but then I finally figured out that she was using all the Nepali bad words and not speaking in tongues. And now, after 15 years... I found myself between two ladies who really wanted to kill each other.

This beautiful girl just went ballistic and began her American idol audition with her song "Ye Mya Chi" . It was nuts. The gringo crowd didn't understand a thing. The volunteer khuire crowd understood the words and were really excited to finally watch a live 'catfight'... and I was like 'this is not happening!'

The other girl was like , 'This is really embarrasing' and the 'dirty mouth' gal was like 'You Cu.. You Whor... You this and that' . Then after her five minutes of 'Your Mama jokes' , she left with her Fabio!

The other girl who didn't feel like responding to her opponent's verbal abuse then called someone and then she talked like she was a hit man for the Gambino family. 'I am going to kill that bitch, I am going to stab her and cut her head off'... and she went on for the next five minutes.

I don't know who was on the other side of the conversation but I was really terrified. I didn't know our girls have taken Beyonce's "If I were a boy" to heart! Swearing is what boys do. Boys fight over girls. They stab each other in the arse.

But ladies... don't talk like that and please no violence. Let the men fight each other over you not fight with each other for a guy. It's not worth it! Calm down, drink a lemonade, watch a romantic movie and don't kill each other for a Fabio!

So let's all listen to Beyonce's 'Single Ladies' with a SNL flavor! And ladies... you have the right to remain single!


  1. You could have descreetly video-ed it and made it a hit in youtube :)

    I would have loved to see what you saw ... 'cause never seen or heard anything like that before... among our beautiful Nep girls :) ..Girls can be such bit*ches ..can't they :)

  2. i have always maintained that all girl-against-girl conflicts should be resolved with a semi-nude slow motion pillow fight! :)

  3. I second braindead's opinion. I would also like a cage of some sort to be placed in effect. ;)