Saturday, June 29, 2013

Let’s Go For A Hike

Our incompetent civil servants want a pay hike.  How about going for a hike to Shivapuri every Saturday  instead of draining our state coffers?   Our spineless government is planning to increase the salaries of the ‘chiya kharcha’ wallahs by 18 to 25% because our lazy bums can’t keep up with inflation. 

What about us?  We are keeping up pretty well despite the corruption, pollution and never-ending frustration while hoping for a new constitution.  Our visionary clowns seem to know more about destruction than reconstruction. And somebody needs to remind our buffoons that the government should be there for common citizens instead of just handing out freebies to civil servants, contractors and cadres.

The micro-wallahs threaten to stay home, drink local moonshine and play cards all day if they don’t get to increase the fares. The Taxi wallahs threaten to park all the 7,000 taxis in the middle of Kathmandu if the government doesn’t raise the taxi meter fares.  

If our cabbies were given the opportunity to write the constitution then they would probably add ‘the right to tweak meters’ as one of the fundamental rights of a cabbie. And now the No Oil Corporation (NOC) is planning to increase the commission to our LPG dealers while they continue to incur losses on them cylinders.

No wonder, the state-owned corporation is in debt while the capitalist pigs are minting money.  But let’s not be too harsh on our capitalist jackals since they too have to contribute millions of Rupees to our political parties. The NOC staff, from peons to hakim sahebs continue to fill their pockets while we have to wait in line for hours to fill up our tanks.

The last time our civil servants  got a pay raise was three years ago. Now, the lazy bums want a minimum wage of at least Rs 20,000 per month.  Yes, they too have to pay them school fees  for their kids and the annual admission fees will break the backs of any parents. They too have to take the Micro to work and the rising food prices affect them as well. 

But the only difference between our civil servants and common citizens is that we have to somehow manage our budget with our monthly paycheck whereas our sarkari chors have hundreds of tricks to extort money from the public.

Instead of increasing their salaries, why not ask the Food Corporation to provide ‘free rice’ for our government employees?  Let us stop sending ‘inedible’ rice to our rural area. Let’s give it to our lazy bums. No, we are not trying to make them sick but they should get the opportunity to taste the stuff that our poor villagers have to eat. If the common citizens can’t get to share the gain then our sarkari hakims should at else get to share their pain.

Our government employees could save some money if they send their kids to public schools. And who knows, maybe then we will have competent teachers and the SLC pass rate at our government schools will shoot up dramatically. All civil servants should only be allowed to seek treatment at government hospitals.  The government will then do something to improve the services at them hospitals and our civil servants can save tons of money on medical bills.  

Hope our beloved President  will ask the Japanese to help our hospitals so that he won’t have to spend millions again to learn more about how the intestine works.

Our Chief Secretary gets like Rs 33,640 per month whereas a peon makes Rs 9,900. But if you add the ‘express service’ fee paid by service seekers in government offices then even a peon will take home at least two or three times his monthly salary.  As the bribes move up the food chain, everybody is happy.  

If you want to get a lucrative posting then you will have to pay lakhs to your hakim saheb. Then the big fish has to pay some more to the minister. The minister will have to set some dough aside for his or her party.  And the party will have to spend it on chiya kharcha for their cadres.  No wonder, our Baidya uncle and the other weaklings want the Khilly crew out so that they can enjoy a ministry or two.

In the past sixty years, we have seen the Shree Tins and the Bada Hakims, the Shree Paanch and the mandaleys, the Kangaroos, the Unidentified Moronic Losers, the Maboadis and other Kha-o-baadis and now the Khilly crew. It doesn’t matter who comes and goes, our civil servants will continue to drive this country down the drain.  

We should have a ‘no work, no pay’ policy for our lazy bums.  Maybe we should have a new ‘Ministry of Timekeeping’ run entirely by volunteers.  If the incompetent fools want to bunk work then they should also be willing to let go of a chunk off their salaries. It’s time we all got together to dismantle the bloated, incompetent and inefficient bureaucracy. 

1 comment:

  1. Good one Guffadi, keep on writing. However,I guess, the ultimate solution for the government would be to invest the revenue in right sector and help increase the GDP which could make the Nepali Rupee stable. Interest on loans would then be minimized. We need more investment in production sector.