Cricket will keep us alive

Our clowns are busy hanging out at resorts and residences of our top freeloaders and are still coming up short but our cricketers have once again done us proud by winning the ICC World Cricket League Division III title.  

I think our clowns should hire our cricket coach Pubudu Dassanayake to teach them how to work as a team, instead of trying to outdo each other by bickering over petty issues. 

The Cricket Association of Nepal has a new CEO and finance manager. Let's all hope that Bhawana Ghimire, the new CEO will lead CAN to new heights. The old stooges at CAN have been giving the CEO a cold shoulder because they only know how to skim the funds instead of spending it to develop the sport in the country.

I think it's about time all our sports associations had competent CEOs instead of corrupt cronies. I think our government should have a 'Cricket' Fund and we all can pitch in to help build stadiums and provide better  facilities to our cricketers. 

The only we can ever play in the FIFA World Cup is if we host it but we don't have billions of dollars to throw away. But in a decade or two, we might be a test-playing nation and could be in the Cricket World Cup.

Our lazy bums are still wasting our time by fighting over how many provinces we need in our 'New Nepal'. It really doesn't matter how many provinces we have in this land of ours. What matters is that our common folks get enough gaas, baas and kapas to lead a decent life. 

I don't think we can afford to have new chief ministers and pay billions of Rupees to change our driving licenses, sign boards and what not. We don't need political parties offering us 40,000 MW of electricity or turning us into Swiss or Singaporeans. 

All we need is one political party that will work for the people. All we want is jobs so that we can pay our bills unlike our lazy bums who only want to loot the state treasury for their children, cousins and cadres.

It’s sad that our government doesn’t care about the people. Our clowns get free medical treatment and they waste millions of Rupees every year for their check-ups abroad. Our flood and landslide victims have yet to receive compensation. 

And those who have received some relief money  are not the victims but our evil party cadres. I think one should just visit the affected areas and hand out cash and relief materials to the victims instead of having a photo-op cheque-handing session with our beloved Prime Minister.

But of course, our CDO sahebs don't us to do that because they want all the funds and relief materials to be distributed by our incompetent government agencies. Our civil servants have not change a bit. They act like they are forced to do their jobs. Somebody must remind them that they are here to serve the public and not the other way round.

Our cricket team represents the 'real' Nepal. Our so-called leaders do not. We are all hardworking, law-abiding citizens. Our incompetent clowns only know how to waste our money, time and have no respect for the laws of the land. 

But we have cricket for now. Once in a while, when our cricketers win, we forget our miseries. I think our Desi brother, NaMo should have provided Rs 10,000 crores to develop cricket in this land of ours instead of providing the loan to our incompetent buffoons who will only use it to fatten their own bellies.

The 18th SAARC Summit will be here in few weeks and let's expect traffic jams, blocked roads and tight security for our Shark lleaders. Yes, our leaders in the region are like sharks. We are the small fishes. 

We are still the poorest region in the world not because we lack natural resources. We are poor because all the opportunities and resources have been used by our politicians and their cronies while the common folks are left with no choice but to seek employment opportunities overseas.

Our government agencies are busy preparing for the Shark Summit. Yes, plant them trees that will wither and die in a few months. Fill up them pot holes and put some solar lights on our streets. Make way for the bideshis! 

The government should also warn us to stay away from the venue and maybe declare a three-day holiday so that the Shark leaders can drive around the city without any obstruction. 

What about our stray dogs and cattle? It would be nice if KMC spent some dough and bought garlands for our stray dogs. And what about our stray cattle? I think they can work part-time for the traffic police as roadblocks.