Dividers, not Uniters

Our Emperor is not happy with General Rocky Katwal's memoir.  After all, if our comrade chairman had not resigned for not being able to sack Katawal back in the day then maybe we could have had a constitution by now and we would not be wasting billions of Rupees feeding our CA members for the second time. 

  

Katawal claims that he could have been having a good time attending Fashion Week parties in New York City if he had followed the Emperor's advice of quitting and becoming an Ambassador to the UN. 

If he had chosen France, then he would have been invited to wine tasting parties every other week. But the General decided to stay put and not be tempted by such offers and here we are, with a memoir and lot of cursing from the comrades.

Our Emperor claims Rocky was influenced by 'external forces'.  But as usual, like all other politicians, he too refuses to reveal who these external forces are.  

Our politicians and civil servants are all influenced by bideshis.   The blue-plated vehicle wallahs can park their cars anywhere they want and get away with it.  It's a shame that we, the common folks are treated as second-class citizens in our own land whereas the bideshi donor-wallahs get the VIP treatment. 

Bideshi Ambassdors can directly meet with our politicians and civil servants and tell them what to do.  Let's hope that one day our Ambassador to the US will get to meet Amriki politicians and tell them what to do. Maybe, our ambassador can one day influence the US Presidential election. 

Well, that can happen maybe in a Hollywood movie someday but our netas will be continued to bossed around by external forces for many more years to come. 

We had expected our Emperor to be a Mandela who would unite us all but like others who had come before him,  he got caught up with making his near and dear ones happy instead of working for the people.  

Our clowns only talk about the past and not the future because they themselves are not sure where they will be in the next four years. 

Our CA members are wasting billions whereas our flood and landslide victims across the country have yet to receive relief materials. Our incompetent government has once again showed us that they can get things done only when a VVIP comes to town but for common folks, everything moves in a slow motion.  

Thousands of folks in the mid-western region have been displaced by the floods and landslides but our Prime Monster is busy shaking hands with those who donate to the Prime Minister's Fund to help the victims. 

You can also get to meet our PM if you donate at least Rs 50,000. It's funny that some of our media tycoons who haven't paid their employees for the past year have been donating a Lakh to the PM's Disaster Relief Fund.  It's a good thing to contribute to charity but at least pay your staff first. 

The West is being rocked by the Ice Bucket Challenge and we already have Bill Gates to George Bush doing their bit to raise awareness and funds for ALS.  

But we are short of water and instead of being dumped with a bucket of ice water, our celebrities, civil servants, contractors and CA Clowns should take a dip in the swollen rivers across the country and help to distribute relief materials to the victims as soon as possible. 

I think our CDO sahebs in the affected districts should be spanked for not allowing many local charities and social organizations to distribute relief materials on their own.  

The District Administration Offices in the affected areas plan to distribute relief materials and help the victims only after they collect concrete data  of the losses. And our CDO sahebs want the relief materials distributed from a single source so that they can separate the stuff that can be distributed to the victims and ones that can be kept for themselves.

Our Home Minister is busy visiting the CDOs in the affected districts and spending taxpayers money on his chopper rides but he does not have time to visit the victims and their families.  

Our incompetent government can clear all road dividers in the capital in a day so that Modi and his entourage can speed their way around the citywithout any obstruction. But the government is not interested to help the citizens who have lost their families and homes to the floods and the landslides. 

This is the time when we should all unite and do our bit to help the landslide and flood victims across the country. Our politicians should stop blaming each other and our civil servants should stop slacking off.  Our political parties have hundreds of thousands of cadres doing nothing but hanging out at local chiya pasals and reading tabloids. 

Maybe, they should take some training on rescue and relief operation and help in times of natural disaster instead of only burning tyres and hurling stones at each other. If our hooligans knew how to make the used tyres into rafts then it would come in handy during the monsoon floods.