Saturday, September 28, 2013

Khilly Dai goes to New York

Khil Dai is in New York to attend the UN General Assemby natak.  Instead of wasting our taxpayers' money, Khil Dai should have stayed home and attended late-night meetings with our clowns.  But who wants to forgo free travel and chiya kharcha?  

Let's hope that the Regmi couple will at least visit a few tourist hot spots in New York City instead of just taking pictures with other heads of states.

Please do visit the Empire State Building, the Statue of Liberty, the Bronx Zoo and other cool places. And don't forget to take the '7' train to Queens when you attend some dinner gathering with our NRNs.  

Let's hope Khilly will get a few ideas of what can be done in Nepal while he is in New York. Even if he is not going to be an organic farmer at Baluwatar for long, he can at least start some cool stuff before he leaves the Prime Monster's residence.

We should have a building like the 102-story Empire State Building. Let's get all the ministries and government agencies from the old Rana durbars and house them in one building instead. Instead of running around town, it would be much easier for all us service seekers to get inside a single building and get our paperwork done.  And what should we do with old Rana Durbars? 

Well, the party palaces are running out of space. Maybe they could lease them durbars from the government. It seems like our government is just waiting for them old durbars to collapse. 

If you visit a government office housed in them palaces then you will at least find two broken windows, three doors with big holes and four rusting vehicles that have weeds growing around them. 

And it seems like no one has showed up to clean up them places since the Ranas left the buildings. At least the party palace wallahs will maintain them durbars better rather than letting them rot. 

Well, them palaces might smell like curry but it's much better to have some indigestion after gorging on oily food than being inside a damp, cold, moldy building and getting some respiratory problems while waiting for the hakim saheb to show up to sign your paper.

Our one and only Zoo in Jawlakhel badly needs a facelift. Maybe Khil Dai will get some ideas when he visits the Bronx Zoo. Our Zoo doesn't even have 40 animals whereas the Bronx Zoo has more than 4,000. Maybe Khil Dai can ask for an animal each from all the member  countries of the UN. 

And we should have a empty cage at our Zoo as well. Just put up a sign that reads 'Politician' and whenever one of our clowns is sent to jail for corruption, we can put him or her in that cage. 

We do understand that we are not supposed to threw peanuts and food at them animals but the Zoo officials should encourage pelting tomatoes at the guilty politician. And he or she can later use them to make a piro Tamatar ko Achar in the evening.

Our clowns want to build a Republican statue somewhere.  Well, it's already been more than five years and we are still waiting for it. Khil Dai should visit the Statue of Liberty and then ask the French to send us something new.  Instead of having a Roman Goddess of Freedom,  why not have a statue of a dirty politician trampling on common people?  

After all, we expected our lives to change for better but it seems like our clowns are more interested to rip off the public in this great Republic than writing the constitution and letting the common citizens live a decent productive life.

And Nepal Tourism Board won't have to spend millions of Rupees trying to attract tourists to the country. We could be getting millions of tourists to visit our 'politician' statue. 

Since our political parties are into burning effigies, why not organize a big 'burning man' festival here and burn effigies of all politicians from all nations just to show that we are not against just somebody but every politician in the world? And all the opposition wallahs around the world would be flying to Kathmandu for the festival.

Baidya Ba and ask his fellow weaklings have announced nationwide shutdowns from November 11 to 20. Maybe Khil Dai should visit the angry birds after he comes back from New York and gift them a dozen khasis for Dashain.  

Why not bring 'I Love NYC' t-shirts for all our clowns, a few dozen topis, a box of key-rings and coffee mugs? But our clowns don't drink coffee. They drink whiskeys. Maybe that's why our buffoons have late-night meetings, munching on mutton sekuwas and drinking bidhesi raksis while they talk politics.

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