Saturday, December 19, 2015

Family comes First!

Our honorable Home Minister Shakti Basnet has shown us all that he is no different from the rest of the clowns who have become mantris in our land. I think we need to remind our Home Ministry wallahs that their job is to provide security to the public, maintain law and order in this land and make sure that those affected by natural disasters get taken care of by the government.

But it seems that the Home Ministry has other priorities like harassing our own folks at the immigration counter at TIA and making sure that the government employees at our District Administration Offices across the country slack off and give a hard time to service seekers for no apparent reason. 

Instead of protecting our highways and borders, the Home Ministry only protects the netas and their residences.  Instead of going after crooks, our Home Ministry makes sure that black marketers make all the money but if they don't pay the thulo mancheys then our police wallahs confiscate the goods and make some money anyway.

Instead of apologizing to the country, Shaktiman apologized to his comrades for sending his relatives to China for a nice vacation in the name of earthquake survivors. I don't think he has done anything wrong by sending his daughters and granddaughters of our Emperor to try out some dim sum and learn how to use chopsticks. 

After all, we all  need to broaden our horizon and foreign trips certainly helps our netas and their children to see the jhili-mili and modernization there and then dream of looting more to fund their privileged lifestyle.

Our politicians have no shame. They have no morals. It seems that being able to loot the state treasury and give free foreign trips to your loved ones brings honor to the netas. Some of our former mantris have been to jail and fined millions of Rupees. 

When they are released, a dozen cadres welcome them with garlands and abir as if the corrupt clown just came back from a successful trip to Mars. Let's hope that Elon Musk will someday colonize Mars and we can send all our netas, civil servants and con artists for a life-time vacation there.

The CIAA has forced our former molester mantri Hari Parajuli to refund 2.6 lakhst he had misused to send his son to Australia to try some chocolate milk. Why do our freeloaders think that they must waste our taxpayers' money on foreign trips for themselves and their dear ones instead of spending it for the people back home? 

And when they are out of power, they want freebies such as vehicles, security, chiya kharcha and what not. 

Our Oli government wants to provide lifetime free gift hampers to our VVIPs. Well, all our successive governments have been trying to provide such perks to our thulo mancheys. They are not ashamed that they make millions in bribes and still need more when they are no longer in power. 

Our former Prime Monsters and other VVIPs continue to drive around in luxury vehicles and get free fuel and chiya kharcha. If you have already made billions of Rupees from kickbacks and other shady deals then why the hell do you still need a few lakh Rupees a month from the state?  

And now our CIAA wallah has asked the government to suspend APF Chief Shaab because they believe that he had made millions of Rupees by faking bills and taking kickbacks from vendors.  IGP Onta is not alone. Most of our so-called senior level police officers and Army generals all make Karods from vendors who supply stuff to our security agencies. 

Nepal Army now wants to save Rs 40 Karods by buying biskoots and stuff directly from the companies instead of third party supplier. I guess our byaparis who make easy money from such contracts are not too happy. Our Defence Mantri must be pissed off as well. Hope our Nepal Army Chief Shaab will use the savings for housing for our soldiers so that they won't have to live in bunkers across the country.

If we are able to get refunds from all our netas who have misused the state funds for overseas trips then we could have enough funds to develop a 1,000 MW hydropower project. Maybe that could end our load shedding problem in this land.

You know that winter is here when our No Electricity Authority (NEA) decides to increase load shedding hours. Our Energy Minister promised us that we will have power for lunch and dinner but I guess he really doesn't know how our NEA works. 

The folks at NEA buy faulty transformers so that they can make some money. They are not in a hurry to develop more hydropower projects to get rid of load shedding but they are always in a hurry to provide license to dalals both domestic and foreign and make some chiya kharcha. 

All we need is just a thousand MW and we will get electricity for 24 hours a day. Our government can't afford to spend a billion dollars so that we can save five if we have power all the time and then won't have to spend so much on fuel, inverters and cooking gas.

Why do we need foreign companies and investors? Why can't we raise a billion dollars on our own. We have more than 3 million folks overseas. I am not an economist or some financial expert but we must have at least half a million here at home who can afford to pitch in a lakh if the government is willing to ask us to invest in a hydropower project in our own land. 

Our migrant workers overseas can contribute their one month salary and us here at home and contribute our share. Let's raise a billion dollars and maybe in a few years if we don't have to pay off a dozen political parties and civil servants then we might finally be load shedding free by 2020.

But of course, Oli the great comedian has promised us that we will be load shedding free by next year. Either he is lying or is busy smoking something that makes one go crazy. By next year, Oli won't be in Baluwatar and of course we all know that we will continue to have more than 12 hours of load shedding every winter until all of our NEA's transformers explode. 

Then, we will have no power at home and we will all have to burn our own furniture and then bank notes to stay warm in winter as we can't even afford to buy anything that the black market offers. 

Dear chor netas, think about the people first. Yes, we all need to take care of our families but instead of only taking care of your near and dear ones, please take care of the people too. Without us, you won't be able to play politics and be in power. If we are no longer here then who will you rule over, exploit and extort? 

Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at You may contact him at

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