Happy Dashain!

The only person who is going to have fun this Dashain is our former Home Minister Khum Bahadur Khadka. The guy spent more than a year in prison and he is not ashamed of it. He must still have quite a lot of dough left in his backyard.  

Khum Dai must have spent at least a million Rupees to gather his cadres to welcome him after his release from Dillibazar Jail on Wednesday. 

Instead of slipping away quietly, the clown had to show us all that he still has money and muscles. In this land of ours, clowns who are convicted of corruption and spend some time in jail seem to believe that it is kind of a plus point for them. 

As usual, convicted politicians cook up their own conspiracy theories and blame others. We still have yet to get a politician who is convicted of corruption to apologize for his or her sins.

Maybe our court wallahs need to increase the fine and the jail term as well. A former mayor of Detroit has been sentenced to 28 years in prison for corruption. Yes, even in Amrika, they have a few corrupt politicians. Here, we have a few honest ones and most of them don't get the tickets to stand up for election. 

It's very hard to talk about ethics and morality when most of your own party members are only worried about making as much moolah as they can while in power.

Let's all hope that next time a corrupt politician is sentenced to jail, he or she will serve at least a decade or two in prison. And instead of giving them special privileges, the convicted politician should be the one doing all the dishes and the laundry in the jail.

Khum Dai's paid fans welcome him as if he had been elected the Prime Minister.  The traffic in the valley was disrupted due to the rally. Maybe it would be better if our CDO sahebs in the valley at least come up with a rule that makes it mandatory for anyone to first get a permit before they take out a rally. 

And what’s up with the corrupt clown wearing a garland weighing over a quintal? Hope the garlands will be re-gifted to his supporters so that they can use it for Dashain.  

Our goat traders sold more than 20,000 goats this week. Our state-owned Nepal Food Corporation (NFC) sold only 1,600 goats through its fair price outlets. I think another 1,600 goats must have died in their godowns. And then the goats came back from dead and were delivered to the homes of our clowns, civil servants and cops. 

And most of the goats must have been purchased by our contractors because if they don't make the hakim sahebs happy during Dashain, then they won't be getting further contracts in the future.

The Libyan Prime Minister was briefly abducted by armed gunmen a few days ago.  Maybe our government wallahs should send our security personnel to teach the Libyans how to protect their top clowns. 

Our security personnel have failed to curb crimes and protect the public but they are good at stopping the traffic and making us cringe with their blaring sirens when our clowns get on the road. And the security detail drives in such a hurry as if the clown inside the vehicle badly needs to find a loo to pee.

In this age of Republic, the only folks who feel secured and are better off than four years ago are our clowns, cadres and contractors.  The rest of us have to just grind our teeth, pay more for everything and get on with our lives. 

And Baidya Ba has surprised us all by announcing that his party will not resort to violence during the upcoming Constituent Assembly election. It's very hard to believe the angry birds. A while ago, they had demonstrated their hammering skills by breaking a mock ballot box with a hammer. 

Now, they plan to peacefully persuade the  public to boycott the poll. I guess our foreign donors must have spent some dough providing anger management training to the angry birds. Or maybe they just looked at their financial books and couldn't find the funds to buy hammers and sickles.

Happy Dashain to everyone. Please drink, eat and gamble in moderation unlike our clowns who love to drink bidhesi whiskey till they drop,  gorge like they haven't  eaten since last year and gamble our future away so that they can make some few more Rupees.