Saturday, March 15, 2014

Oli, Holi & Goli

Holi is here and our competent cops are going all out to ensure that we don't get harassed by Rowdy Romeos.  Instead of just tightening their belts during festivals, it would be nice if our men and women in blue remained active all year round. Comrade Oli won't be playing with colors this Holi as he is recovering from health issues. If Oli was well then he sure would have fired some goli with his boli this Holi. 

Our netas should learn a thing or two from the West. Former US Senator was hired by Pfizer many years ago to create awareness about impotence. There is no shame in talking about health issues and raising awareness among the public. World Kidney Day was observed on Thursday and Oli Dai could have done his part by talking about his kidney problems and telling the common folks that most forms of kidney diseases are treatable. 

Many of our incompetent netas suffer from high blood pressure and other health issues.  It would be nice to see our buffoons out on morning walks instead of riding around in gas guzzling SUVs.  Our leaders should lead by example and if they really want to promote a healthier Nepal then they should forgo their free rides and walk to work instead of stopping traffic and making us suffer.

According to the Hindu legend, Holi is celebrated to mark the victory of good over evil. I guess the folks back then were willing to fight against evil doers but now, the tables have turned. The evil-doers run the show in this land of ours and they want to prevent the good, hard-working from leading a decent, productive life.

Our netas hire mundrey gundas to do the dirty work. Even our student unions are run by mundreys instead of genuine college students. I think we should move all our government campuses outside the Ring Road area instead of having them in the middle of the city. 

Our Prime Monster is busy having tomato soup instead of apologizing for the natak carried out by the Nepal Student Union (NSU), the student-wing of his party. If those hooligans were arrested with illegal firearms then they should be sent to Rolpa where they could do a few years of hard labor. But our student cadres act like savages and use their stone hurling skills to create a scene. 

Our Home Minister has vowed to get rid of the goons soon. Instead of only targeting Holigoons this Holi, why not go after all hooligans including ones from his own political party as wel? But BamDev Baba is too busy trying to promote his near and dear ones in the police force. And just going after small crooks won't make us safe because most of the mundreys have political affiliation and our cops have no choice but to release them after a few weeks in custody. 

A big-time loan shark was arrested recently and our police managed to confiscate half a dozen weapons from his home. How in the world did the guy get licenses for so many firearms?  And the funny thing about the loan sharking business in this land of ours is that most of the money comes from our senior police officers, civil servants and netas.  The evil-doers were having fun when the loan shark guy was busy doubling their money but he must have pissed a few people along the way.  

Now, he gets to spend some time in custody, drinking milk tea and samosas. The milk price hike won't affect him because he has already made billions from charging high interest to our byaparis.  

If everything continues to go up in this land of ours, then the only folks who will be here are our corrupt folks and mundrey gundas whereas all able-bodied folks will have to venture far away in foreign lands to support their families back home.

And the joke of the week is that our Emperor and Baidya Ba are thinking of a merger. Why did they break up in the first place if they want to join hands again? Maybe, they would have won a few more seats if they had not gotten into a spat earlier. But our political parties break up, make up and then break up because it's hard to satisfy everyone. Every other clown wants a piece of the pie and when one does not get enough then they want to form their own political party so that they can go back to our fake VAT bill byaparis for voluntary donations.  

So this Holi, let's have fun with colors and enjoy the day. Our civil servants once again have a long weekend and let's hope they will be rejuvenated and will get back to work with full on energy instead of their usual slacking off ways.

No comments:

Post a Comment