Donors & Dinners

Our former Finance ministers and so-called experts want our incompetent government to ask for grants instead of loans at the International Donors' Conference. The conference is scheduled for June 25th and as usual, our civil servants have yet to come up with a master plan on how to utilize the funds received from the Bideshis. They just seem to be happy to receive anything as long as it's cash. 

The bideshi consultants will take half, our civil servants and contractors will make some dough and our mantris get their share. The people will get crumbs and sometimes rotten rice as well. While the WFP bideshi will smoke some hashish and even take some to his land.

Our experts have asked the government to make sure that assistance we hope to receive from the bideshis do not come with many conditions attached. Well, Beggars can't be choosers unless you are begging in Ratnapark. 

If you throw a Rupee coin at the beggar, do expect to get hit back by the same coin. A five gives you a smirk, a ten gives you a crooked smile and more than that gives you a blessing that one day you too may live in Baluwatar and make billions of Rupees.

We, the Nepali people are not beggars. We are hardworking, law-abiding citizens who do not expect much from our incompetent government. But still, our government only extorts from us in the name of taxes to fill the bellies of our clowns, civil servants and contractors. 

Our government is a beggar. Our politicians only know how to beg from bideshis. Our civil servants know only how to show up for work and do nothing and yet demand salary hike and other nautanki allowances every year. Our contractors pay off everyone and carry out shoddy works in hopes that they will get the same contract again a year later when the roads, walls, buildings and bridges crumble.

Our wonderful bideshi friends are not crazy or blind. They are cunning and full of bullshit because they only act if their self-interest are fulfilled.  Nobody is going to give our government a penny just because they are compassionate and really want to help us. 

Former Finance mantri, Surendra Pandey wants the government not to accept funds with strings attached.  I guess he got us tons of grants and interest fee loans from the bideshis when he was sitting in the Kurchi. 

Barshaman Pun, another former Finance Minister wants the government to form a effective reconstruction body so that all parties can share the loot instead of only the ruling clowns. 

I guess those who have sat on that Kurchi have done nothing for the country except to make sure that our fake VAT-bill byaparis evade taxes and give some to the minister.

More than two decades ago, Ram Sharan was our Finance Minister. Today, he sits on the same chair, a lot older and still not that wiser. It just shows that we have come a full circle. 

We have the same players who had fun in the 90s running the country and yet they have not learned a thing or two in the past two decades. It's the same old natak. It's not about moving forward and building a prosperous nation. It's all about how to take this beautiful land of ours and its hardworking citizens back to the Stone Age.

If you work in a bakery for twenty years, you will probably turn out to be a world-class baker. If you have been working as a car mechanic for the past two decades, you will probably have enough knowledge to build yourself a car from scratch. 

But why is it not the same for our lazy civil servants and greedy corrupt clowns? Why do they not learn from their past experiences and visits abroad. Why can't they follow development models from our chimekis if they can't come up with their own?

Most of our top hakim sahebs began their civil service career when the Mandaleys were having all the fun. We might have different players running the show since the 90s but our civil servants are the same. Nothing has changed since the days of the Pancheys. 

Our public servants continue to act like they are the kings and we have to beg and bow down and also pay bribes just to get the services we as citizens of this country are entitled to receive from the government.

Our CDOs still act like they own the districts. They do not care if our children and women are trafficked. They have no plans to provide relief materials to the real victims. They bow down to political pressure and provide funds and relief materials to the political parties instead of the public. 

After all, those who are posted to money-making districts do have to pay the personal assistant of our Home Minister. No wonder, our CIAA wallahs never find any evidence of corruption because it’s the PAs who collect the cash and probably bury it in his or her backyard. 

Ram Sharan tells us that the donors' conference will be held in Kathamndu so that the bideshis can see the disaster in the city. Each of us already carry a Rs 20,000 loan on our heads thanks to our beggar government asking for loans from every bideshi willing to fork out a dollar or two. 

It will cost Rs 666 billion to bring the country back on track. Only evil-doers could think of such numbers. Praise the Devil! Our politicians will sell their soul to the devil to make a few Rupees more. 

Let our so-called bideshi donors and our clowns enjoy lavish dinners at our five star hotels while they plan on how to help each other out. Our government and the bideshis have the same agenda. Pay off their own, while the public gets false assurances and half-baked assistance.