Dr Harka Gurung

 

Dr. Harka Gurung passed away in a helicopter crash on September 23rd, 2006. Our prayers to the family on his 16th remembrance day.

The Panchayati era was different. We had an absolute monarch and his style of one-party democracy. Today, we have a multi-party democracy where 100+ parties are registered with the Election Commission.

We all have good and evil in us. Let's leave the bad and ugly parts of our system for another day.

 The only good thing that came out from the Shree Tin regime were the palaces around the valley. But if our Shumshers had instead spent that money on building roads and railway tracks across the country instead of 1,000 room palaces then we could have been a little better off than we are today.

The Shree Paanch didn't go around building new palaces except the Narayanhiti but wanted to run the show alone. We can't blame them. After hundred plus years of being treated like slaves trapped inside their palaces, they were eager to rule hola.

The Panchayati systen was harsh on freedom of speech, religion, assembly and what not but not to be soft on them but they knew how to get talented young folks to be a part of the system.

Our politicians should learn a thing or two from them as well. At least carry out routine maintenance on Singha Durbar or tear it down and make a new one and pocket billions of Rupees. Which option would they choose?

We need more technocrats in our political parties today. Our politicians are the new Shree Tins. They have become the new Maharajas. Instead of inviting young skilled folks back to the country, they are busy inviting shady NRN byaparis to help them launder the black money to St. Kitts.

Enough of the rant. Let's go back to late Dr. Harka Gurung. I heard that he was a good footballer and tennis player. Hope someday, we will have a Harka Cup where not only A division clubs but B C D and even amateur teams can participate.

Our politicians today are not into physical exercise. Well, they do exercise their mouth to spew venom. The only exception is Kamal Thapa. He is a veteran tennis champ but he is pretty much on the sidelines from our political ring for now.

The great scholar needs to be given credit for a lot of things. He did so much for tourism and mountaineering in this country. Hope someday we will have a mountain named after him.

Dr. Gurung was for the Constituent Assembly even during the Panchayat days. Baburam went to JNU and came up with a 40-point demand. If he had only read Dr. Gurung's articles, he would have toned down to less than 5-point demand hola.

None of the 40-point demand by the Maoists have been fulfilled, not even when they were in power or have been sharing power with the same chors who put a bounty on their heads. That's politics. You not only make a deal with the devil, you become the devil.

If our lawbreakers had followed Dr. Gurung's advice, then we would have reduced the number of districts and provinces to make it more manageable. But what do our politicians do? They create a new map that makes it look like we have a horn like an unicorn. Forget Lipulekh, first develop Liwang instead.

Our federal government is still not willing to decentralize power and empower the disenfranchised. Our provinical governments have no power and get peanuts to do any substantial development works in their backyard.

If only had our politicians followed some of his advice, we would have a better regulated border with India, our migrants would be better off and there would have been improvements in health, education and even fighting the climate crisis.

I thinks we need to regulate our border with India. We can also keep track of our migrants who work in India and also keep track of Indian migrants who work here. The remittance from both sides will move through legal channels instead of hundi or hawala. 

And both sides can help their migrants when they are in need as databases will help to manage the millions of migrants who cross the border on the other side for better opportunities.

India would not have to worry about fake Indian notes arriving from Pakistan to Kathmandu then to India. And can you please stop sending hitmen to bump off fake currency racketeers every year or two? There must be some other way to deal with them instead of scaring the whole country with such shootings. Our Nepal Police look defeated when RAW folks carry out these missions in our land. 

But who do our politicians listen to? It's the same bunch of conniving cadres, corrupt civil servants and colluding contractors. At the end of the day, cash is King. 

Our clowns should change their political slogans. We don't want to be another Singapore or Switzerland. We are sick of hearing the same guff for the past thirty years. It's time to speak the truth. 

Just admit that you are in it for the money so that your children and their great great grand children will have enough dough to splurge around. 

The way things are going, don't be surprised if we become another Swaziland or Somalia.

For complaints, send me an email at  maguffadi@gmail.com 

Image source: Facebook

Demolition Man

 

Our honorable Mayor saab of Kathmandu seems to be on a roll. We knew him as a rapper. Then found out he was also an engineer.

Today, folks in Kathmandu know him as something else. If Balen ever participated in a WWE championship, he would probably go by the name of 'The Bulldozer'.

For most of the folks in Kathmandu, he is now the their 'Demolition Man'. Some folks think that he is doing the right thing. Some folks think that he has gone crazy.

Many of our valley follks have built illegal structures on their land. Some of them thought they could get away with it. Some bribed the government officials to get away with it.

Maybe some of them didn't know it was illegal to grab some free land in front of your house. Yes, some people even don't know the names of their neighbors even if they have lived side by side for the past three decades.

Is Balen doing the right thing? It's up to the voters of Kathmandu Metropolitan City (KMC) to decide.

He is now collecting back taxes from our tax evading byaparis and other government agencies.

He has cleared the footpath and illegal structures all around the valley. When it comes to Tukucha, it seems that voters are confused. Is it a river or a sewage. Or is it a river turned into a sewage or well, visit the chiya pasals to figure out other theories.

Yes, we do feel sorry for the footpath pasaleys. Maybe, our Mayor saab can come up with a night market plan from 6pm to midnight so our Rs 200 tshirt wallahs and Rs 100 momo wallahs can also make a living.

When it comes to tax evasion and illegal structures, we also need to hold our sarkari folks accountable. These corrupt clowns had approved many illegal structures by filling their pockets.

And those who have built illegal structures or were using the approved space for other means should also be penalized as well. You just can't get away with only blaming the sarkari chors.

Ghoos liney diney sabai chor nai ho. We are all responsible for this mess. It's time we refused to pay chiya karcha for everything just to speed up the approval process for anything.

The biggest problem facing Kathmanduites is the issue of garbage. Balen is right when he says we should segregate our trash.

Maybe, KMC should start its own recycle venture, a mini power plant from trash and even organize an international art festival where artists from here and abroad can work together to create works of art from the trash collected from our streets and Bagmati.

The landfill problem will continue forever. Maybe Balen can do all Kathmanduites a favor. Promote roof-top farming or gardening. Grow some dalley or lemongrass!

Balen give the folks of Kathmandu free bins to throw their organic waste and make compost mal and use it as a fertilizer for their rooftop farm.

Balen is an independent Mayor. He does not have to find jobs for his cadres, cousins or contractors. He won't be making 10% on them kickbacks like Bidhya Sundar did and he will certainly leave behind a good legacy.

For complaints, send me an email at  maguffadi@gmail.com 

Image source: Wiki Commons

Raju Srivastava

 

Indian comedian Raju Srivastava has passed away at a young middle-age of 58. He had earlier collapsed while working out a fitness center more than a month ago.

He was admitted to a hospital but sadly could not make it and had to leave this Earth yesterday.

Raju Bhai (we call it 'Dai' here) got his first big break from a comedy show in the early 80s but it was 'The Great Indian Laughter Challenge' that made him a star.

We will miss you Gajodhar Bhaiya!

Now, let's talk about our Nepali comedians. We have similar shows like the Indian ones here in our great land. Our new age comedians are of course different from the old school.

Thirty years ago, comedy in Nepal except for the great Maha jodi and Santosh Pant, were more like watching a bunch of contortionists.

Well, our comedians then did not bend their bodies but it was mostly facial expressions which made us laugh. Many made faces as if they were eating a dozen dalleys (hot fiery chilli) or cow dung cake.

Today, our new generation comedians are more vocal about social issues and other crazy stuff. And sometimes, talking about issues seem to land oneself in police custody.

Comedy is not easy. You can people angry with your antics. Some folks are angry at Balen, our Mayor saab for bulldozing his way around town. Some people find it funny too.

But making people laugh is probably the world's most difficult job. We are not the West where we can talk about or even crack jokes on religion, gender, caste, ethnicity, politics and not worry about going to jail.

Our Shark (SAARC) region is a different place. We sometimes have to be a little careful before we fire our comedy rockets to empty someone's pockets. Well, comedy shows are not cheap!

Our new comedians charge 30 to 40k per half an hour gig. They are doing okay unlike Kapil Sharma across the border.

In Nepal, we can make fun of everything except two, religion and caste. So, my request for upcoming comedians! Please be an atheist and only talk about Stephen Huh-King or change your caste to a number and only blend in number theory jokes in your routine.

We are a Republic now or should I say, rip off the public.... we can now make fun of Paras Sarkar and not worry about being buried alive in Nagarjun. We can make fun of Prachanda, Oli and Deuba aka (POD) aka petrifyingly obnoxious daakus!

We dont really have to worry about Oli firing back at you with a real goli or Prachanda sending in his YCL gentlemen to your crib or Deuba spitting all over you with his saliva.

But you can't create a song or a music video and show our politicians and cadres suffering like us, ordinary Nepali citizens. You will have to delete your stuff from Youtube.

Anyways, don't make fun of Newars. Don't make fun of anyone but .... let me see.. the Bhramins. They are the least likely ones to be offended because at the end of the day they know pretty well who rakes in the moolah.

Okay, that was a joke as well. So, to all the beautiful Bhramins. Study hard, dont waste your money on masu or trying to win over your sasu. Just tighten up your belt, pass that Lok Sewa exams and ka-ching.. let the thunder (aka money) roll!

Well, I think that goes to all folks, doesnt matter which caste or creed you belong to.... study hard, work hard and party moderately! And save some money.

Follow the 2740 rule. Save Rs 274 Rupees per day and you will have Rs 100,000 in a year.

1 lakh will get me nothing... you might say. Well, at least it willl get you a round trip 4N5D somewhere. If you want to be wise then you need to travel.

If you stay in your tole all your life, you might not burn a hole in your pants but you will also never know what's outside the forbidden forest. Now, I am getting cryptic. This number theory is getting in my head!

For complaints, send me an email at  maguffadi@gmail.com 

Image source: The Express Tribune

President's Rule

Our Madame President has rejected the Citizenship Bill passed by our lawbreakers. What does this mean? Is it a showdown between the clowns and the Ringmaster?

Some say that the President's decision to throw the bill out the window tramples on the constitution. What's next? Buy a trampoline for Shital Niwas and do some trampling all day.

Our President has some reservation and that's probably the reason she wants some amendment to the bill.

Our lawbreakers seem to forget that our Madame President is the commander-in-chief of our great nation.

If there is a power struggle and it comes down to a MMA-like fight on the streets then she knows whom to call for help.

Our lawbreakers can bring tons load of freeloaders to the Capital on trucks, buses and what not. Hope our President doesn't bring out the tanks on the banks of Bagmati.

Yes, according to our half-baked constitution, the President has to perform her duties with consent from the cabinet.

The media tells us that half a million folks will be affected due to her refusal to authenticate the bill. But what's the real story, morning glory?

Winter is coming. It's Shital Niwas vs Singha Durbar. The ruling rowdies back the bill. The unruly crowdies back the President's decision for review of the bill.

Our President has been seeking advice and views from everywhere. Some folks say she is stepping out of line. Her job is to drink doodh chiya and hand out medals to the public.

The President thinks it's her job to safeguard the constitution from the con artists. She had sent the bill back to the House with 15-point suggestions.

We have our great federal and provincial elections coming up this November. 5 more years of the same bunch of vagabonds and pickpockets or are we going to elect more independents like Harka and Balen?

It's about time, we had an age limit and term limit for our lawbreakers. I think once you are 70, it is time to pack up your guntha and head to Benaras from Baluwatar or Balkot or wherever.

The parliament is dead for now. We have to wait till December before we get our lawbreakers back to the House for their free chiya and biskoot.

It's been more than thirty years since we re-started our multi-party democracy thing. Let's hope, we will finally get good governance by 2052 AD when even the second rung leaders of our same old chor parties are long gone from the face of this Earth.

But, a question to ponder.. what would happen if the President takes over the game instead of just being an umpire. Well, we will have the military running the show for a while and then few years down the road, another election perhaps but hope not the same clowns eating the cake again!

For complaints, send me an email at  maguffadi@gmail.com 

Image source: Wiki Commons