One Thousand Dollars!

Our government tells us that our per capita income has now crossed the US$1,000 mark this year.  Should we be happy that we have finally crossed the 1,000 mark or should we be angry that our politicians and civil servants have made this country and its citizens poor by looting us all?

We hear that our Emperor spends ten times more on bideshi whiskey each year. While average Nepalis can barely afford to buy a cup of milk tea each day, our politicians can afford to drink expensive wines and whiskey every night. 

But of course, our Emperor doesn't need to open his wallet and spend his own money. He will always have byaparis bringing him Blue Label and boras of cash. It's funny that the man who promised to fight for the poor now resides in a mansion and enjoys the life of a billionaire. 

It seems that for our politicians, politics is a get-rich-quick scheme. We need someone to remind our chors that there is a difference between public service and self-service. But our Madame President is busy visiting temples rather than telling our juvenile delinquents running our country to get their act right. And our PM Oli is busy doing what he does best, which is dreaming and asking us to dream with him even if those dreams may never come true. 

Yes, we all need to dream for a better tomorrow but what we need now is a doer instead of a talker. Our politicians need to focus first on the basic stuff rather than talk about so-called national pride projects and what not. We don't care about ships in our rivers or trains from Lhasa to Lamjung to Lucknow. It's about time our netas and civil servants focus on what needs to be urgently addressed instead of promising us to send a politician to Mars. 

It's a shame that our capital city is dirty, dusty, stinky and without adequate drinking, sewage and even transportation system. Most of us have to buy water from private tanker wallahs and most of it is filthy anyway. Most of us have to buy scooters and bikes because the private buses and micros don't get to all the neighborhoods in the city. Our government can't even clean the Bagmati river and yet it promises to clean up the bureaucracy and the system that continues to drags us down. 

We wanted someone like Jose Mujica but instead we got ourselves a Zuma. Why do our politicians start out fighting the system with courage and don’t worry about their lives but once they are lucky enough to survive it all then change their colors? We have yet to find a politician who shuns a luxurious lifestyle. It seems that all those years of sacrifice was meant to finally loot us all and enjoy the life of a Maharaja once they get to power!

Our political parties never fail to promise us that we will all be making at least US$ 10,000 per year in a decade and more than 10,000 MW of electricity if they get the majority of the votes.  Well, they have been promising us the same thing for the past three decades. We have seen many political parties heading our government and none of them have done much for this country except to enrich themselves and their cousins and cadres. 

Yes, let us all congratulate our politicians and civil servants for doing all they can to make sure that we, the people remain poor while our thulo mancheys make more in a day from ghoos juice than what our average folks make in a year. 

There is nothing to be happy about when the bideshis tell us that we are one of the poorest countries in the world. How can the most beautiful land on earth with the most hardworking citizens remain poor forever while our civil servants and politicians can afford to buy apartments worth half a million dollars for their kids in New York, Sydney and London?

Many NGOs and INGOs make money by playing the 'poverty' card while the directors, consultants and employees of such organizations will continue to be happy as long as our government remains ineffective, inefficient and corrupt. 

We will know that we are moving towards prosperity when our annual growth rate hits at least 10%. Our chimekis are the next superpowers of the world. By 2030, they will be ruling the world while we will probably be making a little bit more than what we do today.  We have the potential to attract more than 100 million tourists from Chindia and we have not even achieved 1% of our potential yet. 

But that is possible only if our government supports those involved in the tourism sector. But in Nepal, the job of the government is not to encourage businesses to grow and support them with incentives and tax breaks. Instead, our civil servants would rather help our business evade taxes so that the chiya kharcha will go to the hakim sahebs and our netas instead of our State treasury.

That's what's great about this country? Those who seek our votes make all the notes while the voters get nothing but false assurances. You know your country is in a bad shape when a villager in a remote area has to charter a helicopter and pay thousands of US dollars to take his pregnant wife to the city for medical treatment.  He will then have to pay off the loan by selling whatever he has or go to the Middle East.

Our Finance Minister tells us that our state treasury has little cash and we are almost broke but it seems that our government has no plans to take drastic steps to cut down wasteful spending on benefits and perks to our civil servants and politicians. 

It seems that no one is ashamed to ask for free lunch from the State. It's time we asked our politicians and civil servants what they can do for this country rather than what this country can do from them. Yes, JFK's words are still relevant to all of us today.

Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at guffadi.blogspot.com. You may contact him at maguffadi@gmail.com

Make our Schools Great Again!

Let us congratulate our Chief Minister (CM) of Province 7 Trilochan Bhatta for enrolling his kid in a community school. Finally, we have a politician who thinks that his kid is better off studying in a community school than in expensive private schools. We hope our politicians and civil servants will also learn a thing or two from CM  Bhatta. It's about time our thulo mancheys worked together to make our community schools great again. 

Most of our politicians and civil servants today are all products of our public schools. They all went to schools in their villages and probably came down either to the capital or major cities in the country for higher education later on. They did just fine studying at our public educational institutions but now, they seem to have forgotten their past and where they have come from. 

If our politicians and civil servants provided financial support to the schools they attended then those schools would have adequate teachers, textbooks and other resources to teach the kids. The kids would someday be our hakims sahebs and netas and maybe they would turn out to be different and better leaders than the loafers we have gotten so far. 

Most of us cannot afford to send our kids to private schools but somehow we seem to manage our budget be it from loans or selling our ancestral property or getting our dough from our loved ones who are working overseas.  The government talks about regulation but never really takes action against private enterprises charging exorbitant fees for their services.

We seem to think that expensive schools, hospitals and anything that will make your wallet shrink must provide better quality stuff than the rest. Sometimes, it is true but most of our byaparis are here to fleece us with substandard work or services rather than winning our hearts and minds by offering quality products. 

CM Bhatta is right when he tells us that the quality of education in our public schools will improve only if our thulo mancheys also send their kids to such schools.  Most of our hakim sahebs send their kids to private schools in the valley. Our politicians do the same as well. 

Our government thinks that we are better off if we no longer allow private schools to operate in the country. Yes, let us all get rid of private enterprises and let the government offer us free education, free healthcare and transportation. Then life would finally be a little bit easier in this land of ours but only if the government made sure that our public school teachers, doctors and bus wallahs showed up at work on time and did their job well.

Our parents spend more than what they earn to send their kids to private schools. Our private hospitals charge us more than our hotels for a night stay and our private bus wallahs fix their own routes and prices to prevent competition. But things are slowly changing. Our government tells us that the so-called syndicate system in our transport sector will no longer be entertained. 

But we all know that it will be difficult for our politicians to shut down our byaparis who run the private schools, hospitals and the transportation business. After all, these three sectors provide billions of free money to our politicians and hakim sahebs. The bus wallahs provide free bus services to ferry cadres of our political parties during their conventions and during elections as well. 

Our private hospitals and schools are targeted by political parties, underground political parties and criminal organizations masquerading as political parties whenever they need quick cash. When our Emperor and his courtiers were either hiding in Rolpa or Delhi during the so-called civil war, private school wallahs were the ones who were targeted for the fundraising drive for our comrades. So let us not only blame our byaparis for making profit by running their private schools, hospitals and transportation businesses. 

If our government had taken care of business in the first place then we, the people would not be at the mercy of these byaparis for the health, education and transportation needs. Our public colleges were great back in the days. Some of us still remember the blue Sajha Yatayat and their timely and quality service across the country. Our government hospitals were doing their best with the resources they received. 

But then the so-called economic liberalization natak opened the floodgate for private investment in nearly everything which is not a bad thing but then our politicians destroyed our public schools and health institutions by hiring their own cadres and making it a place to make quick bucks on contracts and promotions and what not. Sajha Yatayat has now turned green and is making a comeback in the valley and hope someday our government schools and hospitals will give the private ones a run for their money. 

Our incompetent government has yet to rebuild thousands of community schools destroyed by the earthquake a few years ago. It is the same story with government health institutions across the country. Our kids in public schools either never get their textbooks on time or don't get anything at all. But our public school teachers get paid well even for not showing up or spending their days playing cards and drinking local raksi in our remote areas. 

And it's funny that most of our politicians were once public school teachers. But it seems that the real hardworking public school teachers then ended up getting nothing while the cunning calculative con artists who taught at public schools for a few months or years and then decided to get involved in politics full time made it big in this land of ours. Our public schools has been kind to our thulo mancheys and it's time our corrupt chors at least gave back to the schools.

Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at guffadi.blogspot.com. You may contact him at maguffadi@gmail.com

The New Chief in Town!

Nepal Police has a new IGP.  It's always big news when time comes for Nepal Police to get a new person to head the institution. Armed Police Force and Nepal Army don’t get much publicity when it comes to having new chiefs and maybe it's because our men and women in blue are the ones who deal with the public every day while the other security forces come out during emergency and andolans only.  

But is funny that these two security forces are better equipped and get all they want from our government while Nepal Police does not get the same love from our folks in power.

Earlier, we used to hear about senior police officers offering Karods to be the chiefs of their institutions. We don't hear about the price tag anymore but somebody must be making something or must have promised something to someone to get to the top. There is no such thing as free ride in Nepali politics and bureaucracy. Everything has a price. 

But it seems that our politicians are not getting a free ride when it comes to getting their choice to head the police force in the past few years. Our Home Ministers in the past decade all failed to get their choice to head the police force because then Prime Monsters had the other person in mind or had no choice but to pick the third person due to too much controversy with the leading two.

Let us all blame Deuba for the IGP natak last year.  Silwal is now our MP. Chand has retired and Prakash Aryal has now left the building after a year in office. I think it is time we either had a special term for the IGP. Let whoever gets to the top to at least serve four years and reform the police force instead of just serving for a year and not doing much. It's not that they don't want to bring changes but the Home Minister and the Home Secretary have other priorities.

This is what happens when our incompetent government fails to amend the Police Act and sends our cops home after thirty years of service. A whole bunch of most senior officers have retired and don't be surprised to hear someday that a SSP has been promoted directly to IGP. Every year, Nepal Police loses competent professional hardworking senior police officers due to the thirty year service rule. Most of them are not even fifty five when they retire. 

The last time anyone had the guts to change the service tenure was then Home Minister Deuba who did so to make Motilal Bohara our IGP for four years. The man was probably the last IGP to serve a full term in office. And then the service tenure was reduced to 30 after Bohara left office. 

Since then, we continue to have massive political interference and being an IGP needs both heavenly and political intervention. Even our former IGP Prakash Aryal would have never thought that he would lead the police force one day. Even today, things would have been different if SSP Rajendra Shrestha was healthy. 

We hear that our Madame President wanted Pushkar Karki Dai to be our chief. Some other thulo manchey wanted Ramesh Kharel to head the police force but at the end of the day, Sarbendra Khanal has managed to win the race to be our 26th IGP. All three in the race were competent folks and let us wish all of them the best for the coming days. 

It's sad to hear about Ramesh Kharel resigning from the police force. The man dreamt of leading the men and women in blue someday but sometimes, you need a little bit of luck and a whole lot of political connections to be the hakim saheb. And when you are a government employee, you should not whine and bitch about our corrupt politicians. Yes, Kharel had once said that senior police officers run around politicians with suitcases full of cash for promotions and lucrative transfers. 

Let us not only blame our police wallahs. Other sarkari hakim sahebs do the same thing and even low-level government employees have to pay lakhs to go to money-making departments across the country.  Yes, this whole country is up for sale and those who can demand bribes from service seekers are the ones who are able to afford to pay our netas.

We hope that Sarbendra Khanal who has 21 months to go before he retires will do more than what our previous IGPs have done for the police force. Don't be surprised if IGP Khanal manages to get the government to amend the Police Act and once again extend the service tenure to 32 years. Then, he would serve for another two more years and could bring a whole lot changes to the institution. 

IGP Khanal should first instruct all his men and women in blue to learn to speak like civilized human beings instead of rowdy mundreys. Yes, our police wallahs have tried the service with a smile natak before. Our cops should understand that they have sworn to protect the public not to harass them and treat them like dirt. They should get their priority right and help the public instead of only serving our politicians. 

The public should feel safe around our cops instead of being scared. Yes, our police wallahs have the 'real' power. You can protest against our netas. You can go to the CDO's office and bang on his desk but try to act tough with a police constable and you will get a bamboo stick on your head as his or her answer to your logical question. 

Yes, we need tough policing but it's about time, our police wallahs do more to win the hearts and minds of the public so that we can once again trust our cops. Let us wish IGP Khanal the best and hope he will do more for his fellow cops when it comes to getting adequate resources and facilities so that they can do their work better and be respected by all rather than only being feared.  

Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at guffadi.blogspot.com. You may contact him at maguffadi@gmail.com

Dilly Delhi!

As usual, Oli too has decided that India comes first when it comes to the PM's first official trip abroad. We thought Oli would fly to Beijing and try some Dim Sum instead of Samsoas. Well, Xi will be running China for life but I guess our PM's advisors think Modi will be around for a long time as well. 

Well, India has no term limit and China just got rid of the two term limit for their thulo mancheys and here, we have Oli who could be our own MoXi but of course he has to share the space with Prachanda. 

Oli is taking with him a jumbo team of sarkari officials, byaparis, cadres and cousins. We don't need to be wasting millions for such foreign trips and that too to India. Just take a bus to the border and meet the Desi PM there. Instead of an hour, our PM can take a whole day to at least see his country while he heads to India on a bus. 

We all know that our civil servants are lazy and they always fail to do their homework before our PM goes on such trips abroad. The Indians are always well prepared. They know what they want from us. They want water, electricity and many more which we don't know but the Indian Embassy certainly has a wish list. 

They tell us that will buy our electricity only if Indian companies get to build the hydropower projects here. If the Chinese builds our dams then Modi and his courtiers will not buy electricity from us. Yes, we need foreign investment but the only folks willing to put some dough in our land for their own self interest are the Desis and the Chinese. It seems that we are the football in the Chinida Games!  

The only way possible for chimekis to stop pushing us around is to invite the French to help us a build a nuclear power plant and let them run it because our government folks have a bad record when it comes to maintenance. Just look at our state enterprises or even government offices. Our government can't even fix the broken windows or the fallen walls from the earthquake and we can't expect them to run a nuclear power plant, do we?

Once, we go nuclear then we can at least make our demands and our chimeks will at least listen to us for once. Let's learn a thing or two from the North Koreans except the slow moving green train.

The Desis have every right to look after their self interest. But what are our interests and how do we stand up for our rights as well? Now, that's where our civil servants and politicians fail miserably. Our hakim sahebs act like they are masters instead of public servants here in Nepal but when they go to Delhi, they are puppets and only want to make the Desis happy so that their kids can get scholarships to Indian universities or get promotion with the blessing from the Indian Ambassador here. 

Where on earth do Ambassadors have such clout except in Nepal? Yes, don't be surprised to learn that many of our hakim sahebs heading our government agencies get their instructions from the chimekis because they got to that position from the help across the border.

We expected Oli to be different. He wants to be our Lee Kuan Yew or Mahathir.  Maybe, he should have visited Singapore or Malaysia instead. But Malaysia is busy with political nataks where the PM is accused of embezzling close to a billion dollars and the government is doing what it can to make sure that the opposition fail.  

Yes, the government there is suspending the registration of the opposition parties and even bringing out laws to jail folks for ten years for publishing fake news. Malaysia is no longer the country Mahathir dreamt off. It is now a kleptocracy at its best. And it seems that we too are the same because our politicians do their best to undermine democracy and our legal system and exploit the people and our resources to enrich themselves. Maybe, Oli would have done us all a big favor if he had visited Singapore. 

The only thing we have common with both India and Singapore is that our Nepali brothers serve in the security forces in both of the lands. Nepalis have been serving in the Indian Army from the days of the British Raj. Our brothers have been serving in the Singapore Police Force after the British left India. 

Our communists tell us that they will end recruitment of Nepali citizens in foreign armies but after elections, our comrades seem to forget about the issue. Yes, we are the only nation in the world where citizens can serve in foreign armies. Our folks take the the oath under the Indian, British and Singaporean flag when they join the security forces there. 

Thousands of Nepalis have died fighting for then British Empire in the First and Second World War and our country has yet to build a memorial for them. What can we expect from our government which cannot even build a memorial for folks who died during the so-called civil war from 1996 to 2006?  We have already forgotten the thousands who died at the hands of our comrades and the security forces.

Our martyrs from the days of the Ranas to the recent andolans are all forgotten. This is the land where politicians can kill civilians and security personnel and get away with it. Yes, we are being ruled by a bunch of thieves and we are a kleptocracy at its best as well! 

Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at guffadi.blogspot.com. You may contact him at maguffadi@gmail.com