Saturday, April 28, 2012

It's all about the money....

The Mumble Bee hardcore faction has decided to activate the ‘People’s Volunteer Bureau’ and it looks like Baidya Daju and his crew really want to take to the streets and start a mass uprising or something. But we don’t have a King to kick around anymore. We will have to do with an Emperor now and Shree Aath Maharaja has made it clear that he has a magic wand that can make or break a party rey. If our Emperor wasn’t a politician then he would probably be a world-class magician today.

The PLA commanders don’t have a single paisa left in them bank accounts and I guess our YCL cousins will have to start sending out greeting cards to our byaparis and tender-wallahs if they want to go home with some cash this Dashain.

Our security personnel may not have adequate resources to investigate anything but they do seem to have psychic powers or must have hired former disqualified or disgruntled PLA combatants as informants. Our police wallahs are finding weapons hidden in drums in remote villages. Now, if they had the endurance to walk a few more miles up the hill like our Apa dai, then they would certainly find PLA’s hidden stash of cash somewhere hola.

Our major political parties really do love them meetings but somebody should remind them that they would have saved us some money if they had met at Ratna Park over badam and suntala instead of spending millions so far on them resorts around the Valley.

Our visionary netas must have signed an agreement somewhere to disagree on nearly everything except when it comes to sharing the loot or making sure the so-called lawmakers get free perks and what not. All our former prime ministers and home ministers will once again get free vehicles and fuel and security. The PMs will even get living quarters and so will our president and the VP rey.

Why are our netas so hell bent on handing out state facilities to each other? They should write a book or go on speaking engagements all over the country and make some moolah rather than enjoy free rides and benefits at the expense of our taxpayers. But of course, who wants to hear them spew venom except their cadres and if they ever wrote them books, it would probably be re-used for environmentally friendly packages for badam and chana-chaat-pawt hola.

Our clowns now want to have a jumbo legislature…with 325 buffoons getting paid to do nothing but doze off in parliament. The only time they will probably wake up is when somebody dangles some free gaadis and suitcases full of cash to vote for some deal. That’s the way it is…our netas make millions while we, their minions can’t afford to buy onions!

And now our comrades want 10 provinces and they want to make Chitwan, the new capital of the federal rip-off-the-public of Nepal. If Chitwan is going to be our new capital then why the hell did Dr Saheb and his crew make us suffer from dhulo-mulo thanks to the road widening projects by shoving some ‘road’ rule from the 70s?

I think we are fine with 14 zones and 75 districts but of course if you were to ask our great netas to name all them places then they would probably call you anti-national and bull-doze you with some random gibberish. Maybe we should just go back to where we started and have 22-24 kingdoms instead and let our stooges rule like Maharajas. After all, that’s what they have been doing for the last four years… innit?

And according to our traffic police chief, DIG Rai, everyone from restaurant owners, senior police officers, to Kathmanduites who had to cut their homes in half, are trying to defame him and his division. Our traffic wallahs are doing a fine job. They have managed to collect more than 7 crores in fines this year .

Yes, our drunken masters are now worried about going bar hopping at night and nobody even puts on aftershave these days in fear that the breathalyser might catch something. Kathmanduites are not happy with the dhulo-mulo from the road widening projects. And senior police officers are not happy with the 15 percent cut given to traffic wallahs hola. But DIG Saheb, you should know better…most of your seniors and juniors who have built mansions in the city are not corrupt… they were just lucky chums who got big fat dowries from their in-laws kya.

Thirty years ago, bribes were passed under the table. Twenty years ago, everybody decided to just place it on the table and now our netas just demand bribe over the phone nai. By 2020, our netas will probably have their own websites with the price list hola.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Save the Police...

Our Home Minister finally got his way and now we have 10 more SSPs than needed. We already have eight AIGs who are busy drinking masala tea and we have about three dozen DIGs who get free rides but don’t have much to do otherwise. And now we have more than 70 SSPs who will take over the same jobs previously handled by our SPs.

Yestai taal ho bhaney, we will have SPs heading the local community police posts and our Inspectors will no longer get to make extra pocket money in Durbarmarg and Thamel. Instead, the young turks who are busy harassing restaurant owners in Kathmandu will probably be heading police posts somewhere in Darchula and Tehrathum hola.

Let us not blame the ‘homie’ for doing some chal-khel in the transfers and promotions natak. After all, his predecessors have done the same and who wants to change the system that lays the golden eggs hoinuh ruh?

Our IGP saheb is pretty pissed off at his fellow officers and he is not happy with the way our ‘honest’ Home Minister has once again used his ‘political’ power to promote his favourites. Our ‘homie’ has vowed to curb corruption and practice zero tolerance policy. Well, so far it’s working mighty well…our policewallahs are finding it tough to make extra dough as they exhaust their savings to get promoted.

The only good news about the recent SSPs’ promotion natak was that our hero, Ramesh Kharel, was also promoted. If all goes well and he doesn’t rock the boat too much then he will likely be our IGP someday. If Kharel had his way, our Home Minister will probably have competent officers hanging out with him instead of gangsters.

Neither seniority nor merit count in our police force. Well, that is not to say all our senior officials are a bunch of loafers. These people are really professionals but our politicians have turned them into zombies. Some of them are too frustrated and wait for retirement after getting pushed over for promotions for years. Some of them have no choice but to run around our netas and do the usual ‘chakadi’ dance!

IGP Shah is lucky he got to be the chief even after he was stepped over by his junior thanks to the blessings of our politicians. Well, the former IGP got stuck with the Sudan mess and Shah got to be the IGP but not everyone is lucky to get promoted on his or her own merit or due to some scam.

Afno manchey is still alive and kicking in ‘New’ Nepal and not much will change unless Mohan Baidya gets to take over the country. Then, we probably won’t have any mancheys in the police force nai! The insurgency is long over and I don’t know why we need 100,000 army wallahs and 40,000 APF wallahs!

Instead of integrating our PLA combatants into the national army, why not have them join the police force instead? Well, it’s too late now and by the time the Nepal Army is ready to select eligible PLA combatants, there might not even be enough to fit a truck since it looks like everyone wants to retire and take the money and run.

Instead of adding more senior positions with no meaningful roles…our politicians should hire more lower-ranked police wallahs so that come next year, our parents will be discouraged from pelting stones at them during the SLC exams!

After all, everything is a numbers game in our country. A thousand villagers are not scared of a dozen police wallahs stationed in some remote village ni and Lazimpat residents showed us that if you are united and can get more than a dozen people then even the police wallahs don’t have the courage to laathi-charge to make way for them bulldozers.

Our political players have changed in the past 30 years. We have indeed come a long way from Mandaleys to Maoists and Madhesis…but nobody has had the time to think about reforming the police force. I guess everyone was busy promoting their own mancheys and making some moolah on the side.

The lower-ranked police wallahs need to learn how to speak, act, and drink. How come nobody has filed a petition at the Supreme Court to prevent our police wallahs from abusing common citizens both verbally and physically? Why are we more afraid of the cops than the chors? And who gives the Inspector the right to slap a restaurant owner just because he failed to recognise the man?

I think it would be better if our new constitution had a ‘30 year’ service rule for our politicians than our police wallahs. We might have a new political system and provinces but when will we get a normal police wallah who knows how to speak without cursing, and investigate crimes without slapping and hitting everyone in sight? And can somebody show me the police manual where it says ‘you can drink raksi on duty’? At least Glucose paani tuh understandable ni.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Gun & Boots to Gumboots...

Our visionary netas must have saved all the nataks for the end of the year or they just wanted to wrap things up so that they could celebrate the Naya Barsa without a hangover.

The only people who really don’t have to take them breathalyser tests are the blue-plated bideshis, the patriotic flag flutterers driving around in them sarkari gaadis and the distant relatives of the traffic wallah on duty. For everyone else, it’s better to stick to Fanta!

Finally, the PLA arms and cantonments are now secured by the Nepal Army. We were all shocked not because the PLA and NA soldiers were high-fiving each other but because our government decided to begin the handover process a day or two earlier. Whatever happened to Nepali tyam?

Our Emperor claims to have really gambled with his ‘handover’ move. If he hadn’t decided to resign a while ago then maybe our freeloaders would have finished writing the constitution by now and the peace process would have concluded sooner hola.

The great gambler sure knows when to hold ‘em and when to fold ‘em but sooner or later, he has to go all in because the poker game can’t go on forever ni.

Four years and billions of rupees in chiya kharcha and bhattas later, we are still hoping our netas will get their act together. The bideshis are now applauding the so-called progress of the peace process while we are just happy to go along with the circus act. If one could get a Nobel Prize for bragging and whining then nearly all our great leaders would have won the Peace Prize by now.

But it’s never too late bhancha ni! We will probably get a half-baked constitution on May 27 and then it’s time for another round of wasting the taxpayer’s money with the general elections. But that’s better than being stuck in a rut!

Our netas have a month and a half now to figure out how to get everyone on the same page and give us a new constitution. I guess we should just hold our breath and expect our magicians to pull some tricks a day before the CA’s term ends.

The banda season has arrived. The Janamorcha banda was mild compared to bandas by the other political parties. I think they don’t have enough hooligans and mundrey gundas. If you don’t have enough goons then your party won’t be taken seriously at all. And you need to be friends with folks who own second-hand tyre stores as well.

A banda is not a banda without vandalism, tyre-burning and harassing common citizens who have to go to work.

We have to thank the Baidya faction for keeping the ‘torch rallies’ and chakka-jaam festival alive during the banda season. Baidya uncle is probably the last of the Mohicans. I think he hasn’t finished reading some books about them revolutions in the early 1900s hola.

Somebody please give him the new editions. Most of our comrades are teachers and we can’t blame them for sticking to their notes because it’s much easier to teach the same stuff every day than revising and adapting to the ever-changing world.

The Janamorcha wallahs don’t want federalism, the Baidya faction just wants to go for a revolt and nothing else while the Lord Vishnu fan club wants to go on a door-to-door campaign to revive the monarchy rey. And we, the people, want a cylinder of cooking gas so that we can at least get a cup of chiya before we head out to work every morning.

Kathmandu is now a cleaner city thanks to Dr Saheb and his crew. He has been busy sweeping and shoveling around town. It is very inspiring to see him and our sarkaari hakims cleaning up the Bagmati river. We really have moved on…from guns and boots to gumboots.

But the week-long ‘Clean Kathmandu’ campaign has ended. Kathmandu Metropolitan City did a fine job by spending millions on over-priced gloves and masks. I guess they will never learn…why do you need chiya kharcha for everything?

I don’t think we will see the KMC folks cleaning anything from tomorrow onwards and things will be the same again. Maybe, the government should make it mandatory for all citizens (yes even the civil servants and corrupt clowns will have to join in the fun!) to participate in a cleanup campaign once a week.

An hour will do…and we can save billions of rupees because we will be buying our own masks and gloves instead of letting KMC do some hina-mina!

Dr Saheb’s Mustang did not inspire any of his fellow cabinet wallahs. His ‘gumboot’ might not inspire us to clean Bagmati hola but it will surely help us to navigate the streets this monsoon.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Squeeze in ... please!

The road widening natak was supposed to clear traffic congestion in the Valley but due to hawa-taari planning and lack of co-ordination among them sarkari agencies, we will all have to get used to more dhulo-mulo this summer.

And when the monsoon comes, the war zones will be more hilo-gilo and we will all end up on the streets because now, even the old sidewalks are just piles of concrete mess!

Our clowns, civil servants, and cops don’t really have to worry about using the sidewalks or walking on the streets because we pay for their free rides and free lunches as well.

Our hakim sahebs are out of touch with reality (they were never in touch anyway)…maybe they should just walk to work one day and see for themselves that pedestrians have to suffer the most as they compete with the bikes, gaadis, and party cadres who love to organize ‘flash mobs’ in the city!

And the new proposed sidewalks in the war zones are big enough to fit only four year olds and only if they walk in single file. Sorry, we are Nepalis, be it pedestrians, bikers or the crazy micro bus wallahs, we all like to hog the road!

Instead of wasting billions on the so-called ‘volunteer’ campaign and giving ‘free’ dough to party cadres, why not open ‘Single File Walking Club’ chapters in the country and give us some walking shoes, chana, chiya, and gas masks so that we don’t breathe in all the dhulo-mulo?

As always, our government won’t have the money because citizens do not figure in their ‘free lunch’ list. Although it doles out billions of rupees every year to all political parties and paketmaars to organize their cultural programs and what not, the ‘real’ jantas get no respect while fake ‘VAT’ bill wallahs get all the love!

If we were to do a poll, we’d find that the only folks who knew that the thing called ‘Nagar Bikas’ existed were the ones who were getting ‘free’ salary since 1977. Yes, Dr Saheb and his crew are hell bent on giving us wider roads by following some plan from the 70s.

Maybe, the land-full people of Kathmandu should align with the landless people in the Valley and start a joint-struggle committee to demand alternative land or housing arrangements for everyone!

I am not against road widening projects but it would have been better if they did one neighborhood at a time instead of going crazy with them bulldozers (owned by Ganesh Lama dai!). But we really can’t blame Dr Saheb and his visionary advisors. After all, they have always excelled at bhawt-kaa-ing (destroying) stuff than bana-ying (building) anything!

Now, Dr Saheb is going crazy with his ‘clean Kathmandu’ campaign. It’s a good start to see our sarkari hakims holding brooms for the first time in their lives and doing some sweeping even if it was for a photo-op.

We would all have applauded if Dr Saheb had taken a whole day off and went on a ‘sweeping’ binge by cleaning up Singha Durbar but he had a busy schedule so he just observed our civil servants sweeping for a few minutes rey.

Of course, he is the Prime Minister and not a ward chairperson or a mayor ni, but he seems to act like the mayor of Kathmandu sometimes! And our civil servants will be fined Rs 100 if they don’t put their trash in the dustbins inside Singha Durbar rey.

C’mon, we are a republic now (more of a ‘rip-off-the-public’) and we should be more inclusive hoinuh ruh? So let’s end the discrimination and apply the ‘fine’ system to everyone!

Maybe Dr Saheb can save billions of rupees and just get the national volunteers to act as ‘fine collectors’ as well. The reason why people continue to drive without their ‘blue books’ and the byaparis continue to sell adulterated products is because of the low fine system and soft punishment.

We could follow the Scandinavian ‘based on your income’ fine system thing but then our netas and their chamchas would pay nothing because they are the only ones who have a hard time figuring out how much they make in a year. It’s very hard to keep track when everything is done under the table kya. Maybe we can start fining violators based on how much their mobile phone costs.

Our government wants us to set aside one day’s salary and give it to some fund they plan to launch soon to help the people. I think Oxford Dictionary should change the meaning of this word in their next edition (if they come out with a South Asian version!).

In shark (SAARC) countries, when the netas talk about doing it for the people, then it means that the party cadres will get to share the loot while the rest of us get the boot!

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Abu Kay Huney Ho?

I went to our tole baasi ko meeting today.... and we were supposed to talk about Nagar Bikash wallahs and why the hakim saheb did not forward our letter to his bosses even after we had asked hamro chettra ko CA member-ni to give us her autograph... but instead of worrying about when the crazy so-called 'Road Warriors' would show up and start demolishing ghars shars in our neighborhood... we spent like an hour talking about politics!

The lawyer dai, who thinks he should be a Supreme Court Justice (someday?) says, 'During the Indira Gandhi administration, back in 1963, tyeti bela ko desi cabinet had passed some secret resolution rey..' Yes, the Desis had planned way back then that they would take over Sikkim by 1990 and Nepal lai 2015 vitra haat paarney rey! Well, the Desis didn't have to wait much to gobble up Sikkim hagi!

I really wanted to get up and say 'Ye bahula, I think Nehru was still alive then and his dauhter Indy didn't become the Prime-Minister-ni till 66' ni!' but I just wanted to hear how the guff-suff followed after then kya... so I decided to shut up! I know Indy became the PM-ni in 66' because that's the year England won the World Cup!

No, I wasn't born then... but I have always been a Enggie fan since I was in the first grade till 1990! Then I stopped watching them World Cup nai.. hehe! I have even stopped supporting Liverpool .. switched to Nottingham Forest now.. haha! (use google baba or mata if you don't get my jokes hai!)

Well, he might have meant 'Nehru' hola but who comes up with all them conspiracy theories? I don't know... I thought only kaam napaa-yeko guffadis hang out at Chiya pasals and get their dose of 'daily conspiracy theories' in this town but I guess I was wrong. Even 50+ budos like to talk BS rahecha!

Then another uncle, probably in his 60s joins the guff session. "Ho ... (as in 'Yes' ni feri..), Mailey pani yo kura muh college pawdney bela ma soonay ko thiye!" Yes, we also heard about how Dippy dai would be the last Shah king back when we were kids. Tyesto po ho tuh prediction bhanya... Nostradumbass can eat bhootya chew-raaa!

Abuh kay cha-hi-yo hamro lawyer babu lai... he then goes on and on... about how you can get this one and only book .. tyo pani only in Delhi rey... and tyes ma lekhya cha rey ..... China will take over Tibet and Nepal will be another Sikkim by 2015 rey!

Whoever has written this book must have drank too much 'funny' water during Holi hola! Abuh 60s ma lekhya kitab (ani late 50s ko kura predict garecha gadha lay!)... it's like Guffadi writing a book now and predicting the death of Gaddafi. He is already read.... you can't predict the past ni bewakoof!

I have no idea what I am trying to say... but lawyer-ji added another guff... 'The Indians had sent 400,000 troops to Sikkim to surround 384,000 Sikkimese rey!'... I guess his dad was working for the Sikkim Census Bureau then hola ni!

Well, we won't be another Sikkim because we don't have king-ji anymore! Unless, India decides to close down them borders and when we have no fuel for like a month or two then we might all take to the streets and ask our Lord Vishnu to come back hola ni.

Well, that's how Biru dai had to back down (tyeti bela them fuel suel didn't matter ... I think it was more chini, noon or ghee hola!) and Gyanu dai had to go back to playing poker online and quit running the country like he ran his businesses after the Desis got tired of giving free lunch to our current Shree Tin Maharaj!

Why is Gyanu dai still going around the country, visiting them temples and bajaa-ing them ghantas? Pahila pani tyetro puja garya ho ni... kehi kaam lagyo tuh? Buy some new clubs and go play some golf at Gokarna Forest Golf Club baroo!

But lawyer-ji tells us 'India will close down them borders for two months after May 27 rey!' Ani everything will go crazy in Kathmandu! I guess he's also tele-pathetic hola.. hehe! I don't know if he read my mind or my smirk gave out!

I was getting irritated by all them guff suff. I am supposed to be the 'guffadi', the one with the stupid jokes ni.. hehe! Tyes pachi, another grumpy old man got tired of all them jpt guff hola.. he got up and shouted.. 'Kay taal ko ho ... kay ko meeting bhaney-ruh bola-yo malai.... sabai saan-shud haroo ko bhela po rahecha!'.

The old man headed for the door and on his way out... told everyone that our netas are full of sheet but they will compromise and give us a half-baked constitution and leave some room for kay bhancha ni... pachi ko laagi amendment saw-men-d-ment etiyaadi.

Then we head for another election selection (feri hamrai paisa jhwaaam!)... while them PLA combatants will get new 'army' jackets and ration paani... and stay inside them army barracks eating glucose biskoot rey! We all know that nearly all them PLA combatants in them cantonments were actually members of them Mao-buddie cultural groups kya. Baroo... yeso dance sance classes haroo run garey hunch hola abuh NA ko barracks haroo ma!

The meeting is finally over.. we decide to visit Nagar Bikash tomorrow at 10am sharp because the hakim saheb is home by 10:30am rey! Life is good for our sarkaari bhaat-eys hagi!

Ani.. I get home... (dal bhat chapa-ing!) and wash them dishes! It's been the rule since someone invented fire kyaaruh.. The last person to eat dinner gets to wash them dishes.. hehe! I am a bad cook.. I only know how to make home fries (rato dhulo khursaani halyo bhaney it becomes "Alu Dum") .... I think I was a dishwasher in my previous life! And I was a good one then pani!

Ye.. lau babal paani parna thalyo.. asina pani jharey-cha .... we all love the rain .. don't we? Ye.. euta geet yaad ayo.. back in 1997, Missy Elliott had this cool track.. The Rain ki kay ho... something like that.. supa dupa fly... I can't stand the rain bhan-chin tyeti bela... wrong song po bhayo tuh .. anyway tyeti bela ko laagi tuh cool video thiyo tyo... then she lost weight and she wasn't cool anymore!

p.s. Former IGP Motilal Bohara lai Special Court lay 18 mahina jail sajai suna-ye-cha. Lawyer-ji tells me he will get to appeal rey... taruh yeso soonda chai Bohara uncle pani aroo IGP haroo sangaw 'marriage' khel-nuh pauney bhayo rey!

Monday, April 2, 2012

Steve Jobs & I..

Thanks coach for the greatest b'day gift ever... finally got to read Steve Job dai ko kitab by Walter bro! My sister gave me a book about Richard Branson, seven years ago.. she thought I was like him kya... well you know, sabai bahini haroo lay afno dai khatara (in a good way!) cha bhun thaan chan ni!

Now, seven years later... I think my sister is really cool and she will go places! Okay, let's get back to the story of the day hai! Finished reading the book... I usually like to read at one go... but 200-300 page ko short stories haroo tuh ekai raat ma bhya-in-cha... but it took me a few days to read all about Steve dai.

Dherai kura mil-do (as in dough) jul-do rahecha... when it comes to them risau-ney baaney chahi... crazy diets and KISS formula. No I am not talking about chooppa-chooppy... Keep It Simple Stupid bhaneko! I have had my share of crazy diets haroo... like eating aloo and ghiraula for 90 days (pet thik hooncha bhaney-ruh), drinking cream soda for a year (heard it was good for ... nothing! )

I have tried so many things... work, business, aroo nautanki nataks. Now, I know why I failed... because I was never a good salesman..err.. salesperson kya! I have been fired many times. I was even fired as the coach of a sports team ... damn.. and even that job was actually voluntary kya!

I got fired from my last job but that wasn't my fault. The partners decided to get into a messy fight and I was like... hey, fire me first then go kill each other. So.. that's what they did... hehe! And it's not a good idea to tell one of the partner (jay bhaney pani mero boss ho ni!) ko dad that he is a grumpy old man and his son is a mini-Sunny Deol look-alike who can't not only dance but doesn't know sheet!

I got demoted in my current job because I was acting like Steve Jobs (minus the cool ideas but lot of 'This is sheet' stuff) hola... and it really didn't work. Well, Steve Jobs got fired only once and then he came back and that's why we have ieverything! My siblings got their iPod, iPhone, iMac and iPad... but I am still sticking to HTC...hehe! My first computer was Apple II but now I like notebook (tyo sano pocket size kya.. pen wa pencil lay lekhnuh milcha ni!)

So here I am.... old enough to be an uncle to nearly everybody in my tole and I still haven't figured out my sheet! I don't think my sister thinks I am a 'Branson' anymore. I did start out pretty good early in life... with my own newspaper when I was 16 (lasted only a few issues .. hehe!), stock portfolios @ 21 (I still have the 'I died during the Nasdaq crash t-shirt!), anti-war activist @ 26 (that was my 'zen' moment hola haha!)... and now, I am just another grumpy old man! One of my sisters told me recently... 'Thank God, you aren't thinking about climbing Everest anytime soon!'..

I am having a pre-mid-life crisis hola... hehe! Anyways, the book is good... Steve Jobs always knew that he would die young... Amrika ma 50-60 pani young nai ho ni! I always though I would die by 27... not dead yet.. so still going or doing okay but now, I have dheari seto kapaal and have been a very hardworking member of the IBS (International Brotherhood Society aka Irritable BS!)

I have no idea what today's guff is about... just wanted to update something hola! So what did I learn from Steve Jobs ko kitaab... 'reality distortion field' (RDF).... hehe! (google that or wikipedia helps too!) It did work for Steve dai... still hasn't worked out for me!

Jay bahe pani.. Steve dai tuh India ghoom-nuh aunoo bhaako rahecha ni! Yeso Nepal tiruh pasya bhaye, he would probably have stayed here nai hola! He would probably be making a cool 'safa tyampoo' ... color tuh sabai 'white' nai hoon-thyo!

So if you really want to think different then you have to try some LSD rey! I don't agree but we all need our 'Wozniak' hola. Billy Goat (Gates) dai had his 'Paul Allen' ni. Jerry Yang had his Filo... Larry Page has his Russian... abuh the list goes on and on!

If Steve dai was still alive, he would probably singing 'Simple Simple Kanchi ko Dimple Parne Gaala' ... hola hagi!

p.s. and breaking news ma chai.. stupid Ashton Kutcher is going to play Steve dai in some indie flick rey! Lau maryo... where the @$#! is Edward Norton? Kutcher.. go back to Iowa and get on a John Deere (tractor) or something!

Oh.. I forgot.. I really don't have any 'cool ideas' to change the world and my design sense is zero .. so I am not trying to compare myself with Jobs ni feri... usko sabai naw-ramro baani chai mil-do rahecha kya. I guess that's why I like Darth Vader! I really don't care much about the iProducts but Thank You Steve.. for Pixar!